I'm such a nervous Nellie when it comes to just about everything anymore. I think it comes, in part, from being let down over and over again over things I got very excited about. I start to get excited and want to shout to the world that something wonderful is taking place and then, as if the universe has to prove a point to me, BAM, something happens and I'm let down all over again. It's always devastating and I truly believe that it's sometimes, a test that God puts before us, allowing it to happen to see how we'll react.
I had a long discussion this morning with someone, talking about this. They talked about building up walls and how they'd developed a system of never getting hurt. I told them that I don't build walls...I build a fence. A fence is easily constructed and creates a boundary. They are not impossible to enter....there's a gate to enter through. With that being said, YOU define how easy or difficult entering through the gate is for the people outside. If you want it to be difficult, you may protect it with additional measures, like a padlock. If you're not as concerned, you might only have a latch. Either way, how high or how secure your fence is depends on how you construct it.
While I'm nervous about things, I refuse to build a wall around me to keep people out. If you build a wall to keep out the bad, you also keep out the good. You may prevent the hurt but you also prevent the happiness and love. If you build a wall, you never open the door to good things happening. Feeling nervous is natural and the degree to which you feel it is different for everyone. Some people are more high strung and nervous than others. If they're like I am, they're constantly concerned about something or someone....the words "care too much" are a characterization I hear often.
With that being said, I am going to continue trusting God with my decisions in life and I'm going to continue pushing forward with allowing people into my life...with boundaries. Maybe all of these storms are going to produce a beautiful rainbow :)
Friday, August 30, 2013
Thursday, August 29, 2013
Standing At The Fork
Let me preface this by saying that this is more of a "thinking out loud" post than anything else. I'm not necessarily writing about a personal situation.
I think that sometimes we forget that life is always about standing at a fork deciding which way to go. Some people are more of a quick decision maker and can just say, "Right" or "left". Not me. I need time to mull it over and weigh the options. I have to look at each position on the whole and weigh the pros and cons and then weigh them again. I am a careful thinker and I'm not much for the "fly by the seat of your pants" philosophy of things.
I'm also a bit of a panicker. What if I go left and then I was supposed to go right? Then I'm spending all of my time retracing my steps back to the fork so I can go right? Then again, maybe I can just cut across but then there's no path there so I'm in uncharted territory which is dangerous.
Here's the bottom line. Worrying is like a rocking chair; you can rock all day but you're not gonna go anywhere (and no that's not verbatim and it's NOT my quote). All I can do is do the best I can and take a leap of faith when it's necessary. Here's to hoping that all of my forks in the road past, present and future have God's hand protecting and guiding them every step of the way.
I think that sometimes we forget that life is always about standing at a fork deciding which way to go. Some people are more of a quick decision maker and can just say, "Right" or "left". Not me. I need time to mull it over and weigh the options. I have to look at each position on the whole and weigh the pros and cons and then weigh them again. I am a careful thinker and I'm not much for the "fly by the seat of your pants" philosophy of things.
I'm also a bit of a panicker. What if I go left and then I was supposed to go right? Then I'm spending all of my time retracing my steps back to the fork so I can go right? Then again, maybe I can just cut across but then there's no path there so I'm in uncharted territory which is dangerous.
Here's the bottom line. Worrying is like a rocking chair; you can rock all day but you're not gonna go anywhere (and no that's not verbatim and it's NOT my quote). All I can do is do the best I can and take a leap of faith when it's necessary. Here's to hoping that all of my forks in the road past, present and future have God's hand protecting and guiding them every step of the way.
Wednesday, August 28, 2013
Lessons from a Broken Refrigerator
As if my past few days hasn't had enough roller coaster ups and downs, tonight we discovered that the refrigerator stopped working. After doing all the "easy fixes", it's official. It's broken (though after finding out that it was THIRTY years old, I'm not amazed that it's done for. LOL). *Sigh* You know, God...I know You don't give us more than we can handle but just so you know, I'm not super woman.
So as we were cleaning out the refrigerator today, trying to getting everything into coolers and the landlord/neighbor's small deep freeze, I tried to focus on what the lesson could be in all of this. Here goes.....
1. Sometimes preparing in advance kicks you in the ass. You can prep and prep and prep and sometimes it just backfires because there's a change of plans. In the example of the broken refrigerator, it just meant more food was going to go to waste.
2. In every age and stage of your life, you have to prioritize. You have to decide what HAS to be saved, what can be saved if there's room and what is not even important enough to worry about. In the case of the freezer, the meat was the priority since it was the most expensive. Otter pops didn't need to be worried about because they could be thawed and refrozen. Reese's ice cream lie somewhere in between....that is in the "eat it now" pile.
3. No matter how "together" you think your life is, there's always that dirty little item that you forgot about. It might be the little white lie you told to cover your ass when you were late to work or some other smallish thing. In the case of the refrigerator, it was the icky, gooey green onions I had stashed to use for a recipe and forgot about. *shudders*
4. Some things just stand the test of time. There are some things that are gonna be around no matter what the situation. In the case of the refrigerator, one word....KETCHUP! (The preservatives alone could make the stuff last for eons).
5. Sometimes you forget what you have until you find a reason to make use of it. It's like when kids clean out the toy box and find the toys they never play with. Sometimes we get so focused on the "have not's" that we forget the "haves." In the case of the freezer, it was the gogurt in the door that was stashed under the ice packs. Score!
6. You don't realize what you have until life puts it all out there for you. A certain someone in my house walked around for days before today talking about how there was "nothing to eat" and "absolutely NOTHING for breakfast." Three HUGE coolers and part of a small deep freeze later, I'm wondering how that's even possible to say.
7. When it rains, it pours. This week has had so many blah, grr, and boo hoo moments that I'm ready to cry just thinking about it. When it rains, it POURS....but then, if there was no rain, there wouldn't be a rainbow.
So as we were cleaning out the refrigerator today, trying to getting everything into coolers and the landlord/neighbor's small deep freeze, I tried to focus on what the lesson could be in all of this. Here goes.....
1. Sometimes preparing in advance kicks you in the ass. You can prep and prep and prep and sometimes it just backfires because there's a change of plans. In the example of the broken refrigerator, it just meant more food was going to go to waste.
2. In every age and stage of your life, you have to prioritize. You have to decide what HAS to be saved, what can be saved if there's room and what is not even important enough to worry about. In the case of the freezer, the meat was the priority since it was the most expensive. Otter pops didn't need to be worried about because they could be thawed and refrozen. Reese's ice cream lie somewhere in between....that is in the "eat it now" pile.
3. No matter how "together" you think your life is, there's always that dirty little item that you forgot about. It might be the little white lie you told to cover your ass when you were late to work or some other smallish thing. In the case of the refrigerator, it was the icky, gooey green onions I had stashed to use for a recipe and forgot about. *shudders*
4. Some things just stand the test of time. There are some things that are gonna be around no matter what the situation. In the case of the refrigerator, one word....KETCHUP! (The preservatives alone could make the stuff last for eons).
5. Sometimes you forget what you have until you find a reason to make use of it. It's like when kids clean out the toy box and find the toys they never play with. Sometimes we get so focused on the "have not's" that we forget the "haves." In the case of the freezer, it was the gogurt in the door that was stashed under the ice packs. Score!
6. You don't realize what you have until life puts it all out there for you. A certain someone in my house walked around for days before today talking about how there was "nothing to eat" and "absolutely NOTHING for breakfast." Three HUGE coolers and part of a small deep freeze later, I'm wondering how that's even possible to say.
7. When it rains, it pours. This week has had so many blah, grr, and boo hoo moments that I'm ready to cry just thinking about it. When it rains, it POURS....but then, if there was no rain, there wouldn't be a rainbow.
Tuesday, August 27, 2013
Life Lessons
Today was one of those days when I had a talk with my daughter that made me want to throat punch someone. I hate that anyone can make ANY of them feel inferior or sad over things they have no control over. Because the person who she's upset over is intentionally making bad choices, I want to throat punch them....and maybe donkey kick them. Hmmmmm
With that being said, it's also a great opportunity to teach a few important lessons to her....
1. People come and go; some are around for life and some for a season. Sometimes they're just in your life to teach you a really hard lesson and sometimes they're there to celebrate with you.
2. Life's hard and just when you think it's getting easier, it throws a curve ball.
3. Life's not fair. Nothing about life is even close to fair.
BUT....
If you focus on the positives, not the negatives, you'll have a better chance at happiness. If you smile when you want to cry, you'll have a better chance of losing the blues. If you talk it out and cry, it'll hurt for a second but it'll make you feel better in the long run. :)
With that being said, it's also a great opportunity to teach a few important lessons to her....
1. People come and go; some are around for life and some for a season. Sometimes they're just in your life to teach you a really hard lesson and sometimes they're there to celebrate with you.
2. Life's hard and just when you think it's getting easier, it throws a curve ball.
3. Life's not fair. Nothing about life is even close to fair.
BUT....
If you focus on the positives, not the negatives, you'll have a better chance at happiness. If you smile when you want to cry, you'll have a better chance of losing the blues. If you talk it out and cry, it'll hurt for a second but it'll make you feel better in the long run. :)
Monday, August 26, 2013
Miley's Performance on the VMA's
Yep, it was inevitable that I was going to have something to say about this for a number of reasons. I watched the VMA's , originally, because I wanted to watch the NSYNC reunion. I won't like; I'm a sucker for that boy band. *Swoon* With that being said, I had to turn it off after a half hour of watching because I determined I was too old for this crap. Lady Gaga's performance was strange but, in my opinion, great. Miley's on the other hand threw me over the edge. It just kept getting worse and worse. I resorted to fragmented sentences (i.e. "What the....why is.....Oh Dear Lord!) but continued to watch the train wreck performance as she burned images into my brain and ruined one of my favorite songs for me. I can't un-see that performance and there is no amount of brain-bleaching Sponge Bob Square Pants that can make me forget.
This morning, there is talk from a lot of people saying that this is Disney's fault. They're saying that this is "just another Disney star gone awry" and that "Disney is responsible." Let me be clear on my opinion here....Disney is NOT responsible for Miley's performance. Disney does NOT support that crap, nor do they promote it. Disney created a wholesome country girl show and made her a star. She wants to "shed her good girl image" and "prove that she's all grown up" by flashing her near-naked body parts and gyrating in a way that can only be characterized as a train wreck. I hope that Miley, like some of the other girls-gone-bad child stars of the past, will come to her senses before it's too late.
This morning, there is talk from a lot of people saying that this is Disney's fault. They're saying that this is "just another Disney star gone awry" and that "Disney is responsible." Let me be clear on my opinion here....Disney is NOT responsible for Miley's performance. Disney does NOT support that crap, nor do they promote it. Disney created a wholesome country girl show and made her a star. She wants to "shed her good girl image" and "prove that she's all grown up" by flashing her near-naked body parts and gyrating in a way that can only be characterized as a train wreck. I hope that Miley, like some of the other girls-gone-bad child stars of the past, will come to her senses before it's too late.
Sunday, August 25, 2013
My Ideal Birthday
In the midst of my quickly approaching birthday and a million other things going on, I took a moment today to just have a fantasy about my ideal birthday. So here goes....
Being that my birthday is a school day, we'd have a babysitter keep the kids overnight so we could get an early start. The start? Waking up before dawn and going somewhere beautiful to hike and take pictures at sunrise. It's on my bucket list and it's something I'd love to do. I love taking scenic shots sometimes more than shooting people....the scenery has so many different angles and it's all in the way you capture it as to how it can be viewed. I love it!
We'd finish up the hike in time to go and have some coffee and breakfast: over-medium , wheat toast lightly toast and 3 sausage patties. Then we'd shower and get ourselves ready to do some shopping. We'd venture out and go buy some new clothes, fabulous shoes and goodies for the house at great prices. We'd eat lunch out...maybe a salad or some Mexican.
Then we'd get dolled up and go to 16th Street Mall where we'd eat some Mellow Mushroom pizza and get a treat from Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory. Then we'd walk the mall...maybe do more shopping, take some pictures and just enjoy the scenery.
We'd finish off the night, snuggled up watching a good movie. So if the Universe is interested in creating my ideal birthday, here ya go.
Being that my birthday is a school day, we'd have a babysitter keep the kids overnight so we could get an early start. The start? Waking up before dawn and going somewhere beautiful to hike and take pictures at sunrise. It's on my bucket list and it's something I'd love to do. I love taking scenic shots sometimes more than shooting people....the scenery has so many different angles and it's all in the way you capture it as to how it can be viewed. I love it!
We'd finish up the hike in time to go and have some coffee and breakfast: over-medium , wheat toast lightly toast and 3 sausage patties. Then we'd shower and get ourselves ready to do some shopping. We'd venture out and go buy some new clothes, fabulous shoes and goodies for the house at great prices. We'd eat lunch out...maybe a salad or some Mexican.
Then we'd get dolled up and go to 16th Street Mall where we'd eat some Mellow Mushroom pizza and get a treat from Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory. Then we'd walk the mall...maybe do more shopping, take some pictures and just enjoy the scenery.
We'd finish off the night, snuggled up watching a good movie. So if the Universe is interested in creating my ideal birthday, here ya go.
Preseason Football: Broncos vs Rams
Let me start by saying that I watched this game with hushed tones because I had a napper in my midst that I was trying not to wake up. With that being said...AMAZING game!
St Louis started off with a quick score. Admittedly, I missed this particular touchdown because I was fixing dinner for the crazies and when I came in and saw the score, I immediately went to a bad place....Gosh, I really don't wanna lose this game. Shortly thereafter, Manning throws to Demaryius Thomas for 6 yards for a touchdown. I'm yelling into my pillow as my youngest yells, "Demarrrryyyyyiusssss Thommmmmmmas" in her best commentator voice, pointing at the screen and giving her Broncos glare! Love that kid!
The second quarter was not good...I'll leave it at that. The Rams started off with a field goal and then, less than a minute later, ran in a fumble return for a touchdown. It was a sad, sad moment for me. We perked up a little when a field goal was scored but it was answered by a touchdown from the Rams and we went into half time 20-10. I was feeling defeated and perked up ONLY at hearing that 'NSYNC was definitely performing on the MTV awards Sunday..Squeee! Haha!
Montee Ball turned everything around for us in the 3rd when he scored a touchdown...a real beauty, by the way. Then in the fourth, we scored a field goal followed up quickly by an amazing touchdown by Lance Ball. I don't think I could have been more excited when we took the lead. Then the Rams marched down the field and it looked like a tie or certain defeat. They scored the touchdown and decided to go for the 2-point conversion. I was on the edge of my seat as the refs looked over the catch which, it turned out, was no good because the ball was not controlled after the catch.
All things said, it was an amazing game and a real screamer. I'm getting more faith in our second and third string and getting a crush on Montee Ball who is doing amazing lately. My heart will always be with Eric Decker though. Hahaha.
St Louis started off with a quick score. Admittedly, I missed this particular touchdown because I was fixing dinner for the crazies and when I came in and saw the score, I immediately went to a bad place....Gosh, I really don't wanna lose this game. Shortly thereafter, Manning throws to Demaryius Thomas for 6 yards for a touchdown. I'm yelling into my pillow as my youngest yells, "Demarrrryyyyyiusssss Thommmmmmmas" in her best commentator voice, pointing at the screen and giving her Broncos glare! Love that kid!
The second quarter was not good...I'll leave it at that. The Rams started off with a field goal and then, less than a minute later, ran in a fumble return for a touchdown. It was a sad, sad moment for me. We perked up a little when a field goal was scored but it was answered by a touchdown from the Rams and we went into half time 20-10. I was feeling defeated and perked up ONLY at hearing that 'NSYNC was definitely performing on the MTV awards Sunday..Squeee! Haha!
Montee Ball turned everything around for us in the 3rd when he scored a touchdown...a real beauty, by the way. Then in the fourth, we scored a field goal followed up quickly by an amazing touchdown by Lance Ball. I don't think I could have been more excited when we took the lead. Then the Rams marched down the field and it looked like a tie or certain defeat. They scored the touchdown and decided to go for the 2-point conversion. I was on the edge of my seat as the refs looked over the catch which, it turned out, was no good because the ball was not controlled after the catch.
All things said, it was an amazing game and a real screamer. I'm getting more faith in our second and third string and getting a crush on Montee Ball who is doing amazing lately. My heart will always be with Eric Decker though. Hahaha.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)