Our nation is so quick to want to find a villain. It's obvious every time that something goes wrong. A natural disaster happens and we are quick to blame the environment or an aid organization not coming quickly enough to help or a leader for not being on top of it. A child dies in an unpreventable accident and we crucify the parent. A divorce happens and we want to pick a side so we can vilify the other side. It's revolting, frankly.
At what point do we accept that bad things happen without a known cause sometimes?
We are not meant to control every aspect of our lives and when we try too hard to do that, God/The Universe has a way of letting you know that you're not in control. If it's happening to someone else, know that you don't have to condemn them. If it's happening to you, know that you're not alone. If you find yourself making someone into a villain, stop and think: what evidence do you have to support your claim? If it's viable evidence from a truly credible neutral source, fine.... you still don't have the right to vilify them to others but you are free to hold the opinion yourself. If it's not truly a viable NEUTRAL source, please consider exercising compassion.
We wonder why the rates of depression and such are so high? Have we considered that our nation's attitude is a contributing factor to the problem?
Showing posts with label #stopjudging. Show all posts
Showing posts with label #stopjudging. Show all posts
Thursday, December 8, 2016
Saturday, October 29, 2016
"Well, if you loved your kid enough, you'd be there....."
"Well if you cared enough about your kid, you'd just take off work..." I hear this from other parents pretty frequently. My job happens to be pretty flexible and I can make it to a good deal of my children's school activities and such. My work at the studio is also relatively fluid, if necessary. I have incredible bosses who understand the importance of family. Unfortunately, some people are not as fortunate.
Before you judge a single mom (or dad) and say the aforementioned phrase, I want you to take a few moments to stop and think. Single parents (and working parents in general) aren't working long hours and/or multiple jobs because they want to escape their children; they're doing it to financially support their children. Belittling them for not being able to make it to every school activity is wrong on so many levels. Making it to the Halloween class party has nothing to do with whether or not they love their child. What you don't know is that they can't make it to the class party because they made sure to schedule to take time to take them trick or treating. What you don't know is that they can't make it to the holiday party because they took off special time to make it to a special family Hanukkah celebration. You see, as you judge them for how much they care about their kid, you don't realize that they have to prioritize to make sure that their child gets those special events. Not all jobs are flexible, folks. Working parents have to prioritize, sometimes, to balance and they don't need your shaming. They just don't.
Look, despite what you might think, your children are not going to grow up and think, "You know, I thought my mom loved me but she missed my third grade Halloween party so I must be wrong." Your children don't define your love based on whether or not you make it to every single school event (especially those during the day). Yes, it is more important to give your children time than stuff but that doesn't mean that if you miss something that is (brace yourselves room moms because it sounds harsh but I promise I don't mean it in a cruel way) somewhat trivial, it's not the end of the world. They will be no worse for the wear.
So if you're a working mom and you hear this, what can you do? My advice is to say, "I hate that I can't be there but I'm so thankful that there are moms that ARE able to make it to make the day special. Thank you." Not only are you being the bigger person AND thanking them for their volunteerism but you are also letting them know that the topic is no longer up for discussion. They see that you are not bothered that you can't be there for the apple bobbing and cupcake decorating because you'll do your own activities outside of the school building.
If you're the mom that is saying this phrase, there is still time to change. Stop and think. Are you being productive with your words? Are you encouraging others? Don't hide behind a "well I just tell it like it is" attitude. If you are guilting other parents like this, you're not "telling it like it is," you're being an asshole. Just know that we, as working parents, appreciate you (even if you don't hear it enough...and often, you probably don't) and that we are just doing our best just like you. Thank you for being there to make these events special.
We can all be part of the same team and do different things but we need to be helpful to each other and encourage each other in this crazy roller coaster of life. Be the change you want to see.
Before you judge a single mom (or dad) and say the aforementioned phrase, I want you to take a few moments to stop and think. Single parents (and working parents in general) aren't working long hours and/or multiple jobs because they want to escape their children; they're doing it to financially support their children. Belittling them for not being able to make it to every school activity is wrong on so many levels. Making it to the Halloween class party has nothing to do with whether or not they love their child. What you don't know is that they can't make it to the class party because they made sure to schedule to take time to take them trick or treating. What you don't know is that they can't make it to the holiday party because they took off special time to make it to a special family Hanukkah celebration. You see, as you judge them for how much they care about their kid, you don't realize that they have to prioritize to make sure that their child gets those special events. Not all jobs are flexible, folks. Working parents have to prioritize, sometimes, to balance and they don't need your shaming. They just don't.
Look, despite what you might think, your children are not going to grow up and think, "You know, I thought my mom loved me but she missed my third grade Halloween party so I must be wrong." Your children don't define your love based on whether or not you make it to every single school event (especially those during the day). Yes, it is more important to give your children time than stuff but that doesn't mean that if you miss something that is (brace yourselves room moms because it sounds harsh but I promise I don't mean it in a cruel way) somewhat trivial, it's not the end of the world. They will be no worse for the wear.
So if you're a working mom and you hear this, what can you do? My advice is to say, "I hate that I can't be there but I'm so thankful that there are moms that ARE able to make it to make the day special. Thank you." Not only are you being the bigger person AND thanking them for their volunteerism but you are also letting them know that the topic is no longer up for discussion. They see that you are not bothered that you can't be there for the apple bobbing and cupcake decorating because you'll do your own activities outside of the school building.
If you're the mom that is saying this phrase, there is still time to change. Stop and think. Are you being productive with your words? Are you encouraging others? Don't hide behind a "well I just tell it like it is" attitude. If you are guilting other parents like this, you're not "telling it like it is," you're being an asshole. Just know that we, as working parents, appreciate you (even if you don't hear it enough...and often, you probably don't) and that we are just doing our best just like you. Thank you for being there to make these events special.
We can all be part of the same team and do different things but we need to be helpful to each other and encourage each other in this crazy roller coaster of life. Be the change you want to see.
Friday, October 14, 2016
For the love of God, Please Stop!
Fridays are normally fun days but today is my "for the love of God, please stop" day. For the love of God and all things holy, PLEASE stop telling the people who are voting for the other candidate that they are trash. This is happening on BOTH sides of the political parties right now. Democrats are guilty. Republicans are guilty. All of the sudden, people feel like they have the right to judge someone else's identity based on who they're voting for. It's like we don't have a free party system and we don't have the right to be different people.
I don't know about you but I don't want a cookie cutter nation!
If you are voting for Trump, fine. If you're voting for Hillary, fine. You are not condoning someone's bad behavior for choosing a particular candidate. You are simply voting for who you think will best represent our country, as a whole. Please respect other people's opinions and their right to do the same.
In closing, I'll just say this: if you think that ANY of our past presidents were without fault, you are crazy. I'm sorry but you are. Everyone one of them has some sort of scandalous behavior, just some bigger than others. They are HUMAN and being human means they make mistakes. If you've never done anything wrong, feel free to judge. Yeah...that's what I thought.
So seriously, please stop attacking each other and focus on how we can work together to build back up the foundation of our country that is crumbling with all of this bickering.
Monday, September 19, 2016
They're Not Baby Gap Models....They're Kids!
Seriously stop with the judgments already on people who let their kids dress themselves. In a world of Baby Gap models and celebrities buying outfits that cost hundreds of dollars, new moms seem to be assuming that they all need to dress their tiny tots a certain way. You don't.
As they get older and have their own opinions, parents still struggle to dress them perfectly. They put toddlers in uncomfortable boots to go play at the playground just so the other moms will see how cute and coordinated their outfit is. Meanwhile their toddler is dealing with painful shoes and inflexible boots holding their ankles in awkward positions making it hard to climb and run around. Moms put their little ones in dresses and tutus for gymnastics but forget that it's hard to do most climbing with those things on them. They are so worried about trying to make sure that the public sees them looking like a tiny catalog model that they forget that their child isn't a doll...it's a human being that has a comfort level.
Ironically, the shame seems to be getting placed on moms that let their kids wear sweats. (Though people still feel like they need to purchase Under Armour or Nike sweats as if someone will judge them if their child's sweatpants come from Target). Why? Because the kids aren't dressed to the nines. Well, guess what....they're comfortable. They're happy. They can move freely. They aren't stumbling around in uncomfortable shoes just to look like a model. They're able to get dirty. It's a good thing.
Shame is also placed on moms that are letting their kids dress themselves. If they're mismatched in pattern, they're gawked at. If they're walking around in rain boots and a dress, they're gawked at. If they're wearing a scarf and hat with their swimsuit, they're gawked at. Why? No really...why? They're happy. They're confident. They're safe and they're being allowed to express themselves in a a safe environment. Let them be little. Let them develop their own personality. Let them use their voice (so to speak). Stop judging these children and stop judging their parents for allowing them to be who they are instead of some play-dough cut out of what you think they should be.
As they get older and have their own opinions, parents still struggle to dress them perfectly. They put toddlers in uncomfortable boots to go play at the playground just so the other moms will see how cute and coordinated their outfit is. Meanwhile their toddler is dealing with painful shoes and inflexible boots holding their ankles in awkward positions making it hard to climb and run around. Moms put their little ones in dresses and tutus for gymnastics but forget that it's hard to do most climbing with those things on them. They are so worried about trying to make sure that the public sees them looking like a tiny catalog model that they forget that their child isn't a doll...it's a human being that has a comfort level.
Ironically, the shame seems to be getting placed on moms that let their kids wear sweats. (Though people still feel like they need to purchase Under Armour or Nike sweats as if someone will judge them if their child's sweatpants come from Target). Why? Because the kids aren't dressed to the nines. Well, guess what....they're comfortable. They're happy. They can move freely. They aren't stumbling around in uncomfortable shoes just to look like a model. They're able to get dirty. It's a good thing.
Shame is also placed on moms that are letting their kids dress themselves. If they're mismatched in pattern, they're gawked at. If they're walking around in rain boots and a dress, they're gawked at. If they're wearing a scarf and hat with their swimsuit, they're gawked at. Why? No really...why? They're happy. They're confident. They're safe and they're being allowed to express themselves in a a safe environment. Let them be little. Let them develop their own personality. Let them use their voice (so to speak). Stop judging these children and stop judging their parents for allowing them to be who they are instead of some play-dough cut out of what you think they should be.
Sunday, July 3, 2016
Stop Shaming
I posted a picture to social media the other day of a beautiful gay couple (both men) that were doing kangaroo care with their brand new baby. Also included in the picture was the surrogate and her husband and the midwife. It was the most beautiful moment and a gorgeous picture that brought me to tears. The pure emotion on these new daddies faces was absolutely the most amazing thing I'd seen all day and some positivity in the midst of so much awful news in our country. Unfortunately some did not agree.
So I'd like to make this clear....
I am a Christian. I am a straight woman. I am a mom. I am also a supporter of gay marriage and a huge supporter of surrogacy to allow gay couples to have a child. I feel like homosexual individuals have just as much right to live the same life as we do. They have no more right, they have no less right...they have the same right that we do. Here are a few things I'd like to expand on regarding this topic. (and by the way, spare me the "you're not a good Christian" speech. Seriously, look at your own life...if you're sinless, you let me know and we can discuss "good Christians")
*Contrary to what the advocates to the opposite side will tell you, there is absolutely NO conclusive evidence from a real study that will say that having gay parents influences your life negatively. Seriously, this goes for gay parents, single parents, kids that are raised by a grandparent/aunt/uncle, or any other type of family. What matters most in how a child turns out is the love, nurturing and discipline that they receive. I have news...there are a whole lot of gay couples that I'd rather see parent than the neglectful or abusive parents I've run into over the years. So stop it with the "studies"....seriously.
*I cannot, for the life of me, grasp how a gay couple is any less worthy of a child and I cannot wrap my mind around this argument. So what YOU believe should arbitrarily decide what someone else gets in their life. Why? If you truly talked to these couples and heard their stories, you might feel differently. If you saw the love and yearning in their hearts, you might feel differently. In fact, if you took the time to crawl out of your tiny little box and realize that there is a great big world and that these couples would make AMAZING parents, you might change your mind.
*So let's expand on the last point. Judgmental people, how many of you have actually TALKED to a gay couple wanting to have a baby? It's very easy to stand on your soapbox and preach about "right and wrong." What makes it different is actually meeting these individuals and realizing the amazing talents, gifts, beauty, and vibrance their children would bring simply because of the rich life they'd be provided. These couples have doctors and lawyers, politicians, scientists, geologists, designers, artists, dancers, businessmen/women, firemen, police officers...this list goes on and on. Who they love is just a portion of who they are. Take the time to TALK to a gay couple, or for that matter, a gay individual. You'll see that the judgments you are passing are just not fair to anyone involved.
and finally....
*Talk to the children that WERE raised by gay couples that are now adults. Guess what? Gay couples have been around since the beginning of time. Talk to children that were raised by gay parents. Want to know what you'll find out? They're just like everyone else. In fact, they might be given an advantage.... understanding of diversity.
I'm sick to death of people deciding to hate just for the sake of hating. Stop trying to represent Jesus with hate. Jesus didn't hate. Stop trying to represent Jesus with judgments. Jesus hung out with everyone. Stop trying to throw false statistics out....it's a load of crap. Stop trying to talk about what "harm" it would do when you've never even sat down with a gay couple, let alone one looking to adopt. Educate yourself.
So I'd like to make this clear....
I am a Christian. I am a straight woman. I am a mom. I am also a supporter of gay marriage and a huge supporter of surrogacy to allow gay couples to have a child. I feel like homosexual individuals have just as much right to live the same life as we do. They have no more right, they have no less right...they have the same right that we do. Here are a few things I'd like to expand on regarding this topic. (and by the way, spare me the "you're not a good Christian" speech. Seriously, look at your own life...if you're sinless, you let me know and we can discuss "good Christians")
*Contrary to what the advocates to the opposite side will tell you, there is absolutely NO conclusive evidence from a real study that will say that having gay parents influences your life negatively. Seriously, this goes for gay parents, single parents, kids that are raised by a grandparent/aunt/uncle, or any other type of family. What matters most in how a child turns out is the love, nurturing and discipline that they receive. I have news...there are a whole lot of gay couples that I'd rather see parent than the neglectful or abusive parents I've run into over the years. So stop it with the "studies"....seriously.
*I cannot, for the life of me, grasp how a gay couple is any less worthy of a child and I cannot wrap my mind around this argument. So what YOU believe should arbitrarily decide what someone else gets in their life. Why? If you truly talked to these couples and heard their stories, you might feel differently. If you saw the love and yearning in their hearts, you might feel differently. In fact, if you took the time to crawl out of your tiny little box and realize that there is a great big world and that these couples would make AMAZING parents, you might change your mind.
*So let's expand on the last point. Judgmental people, how many of you have actually TALKED to a gay couple wanting to have a baby? It's very easy to stand on your soapbox and preach about "right and wrong." What makes it different is actually meeting these individuals and realizing the amazing talents, gifts, beauty, and vibrance their children would bring simply because of the rich life they'd be provided. These couples have doctors and lawyers, politicians, scientists, geologists, designers, artists, dancers, businessmen/women, firemen, police officers...this list goes on and on. Who they love is just a portion of who they are. Take the time to TALK to a gay couple, or for that matter, a gay individual. You'll see that the judgments you are passing are just not fair to anyone involved.
and finally....
*Talk to the children that WERE raised by gay couples that are now adults. Guess what? Gay couples have been around since the beginning of time. Talk to children that were raised by gay parents. Want to know what you'll find out? They're just like everyone else. In fact, they might be given an advantage.... understanding of diversity.
I'm sick to death of people deciding to hate just for the sake of hating. Stop trying to represent Jesus with hate. Jesus didn't hate. Stop trying to represent Jesus with judgments. Jesus hung out with everyone. Stop trying to throw false statistics out....it's a load of crap. Stop trying to talk about what "harm" it would do when you've never even sat down with a gay couple, let alone one looking to adopt. Educate yourself.
Wednesday, September 23, 2015
Open Letter to Working Moms / Open Letter to Stay at Home Moms
Dear Working Mom,
You're doing great! You probably wish you didn't have to work or, at least, not so much. You probably wish that you could be at all of those functions at your kids' school or that you didn't miss a first word or step. In this, I mourn with you. I mourn the times that I miss with my kids just as much as you mourn your time lost. Every time you start to feel overwhelmed with sadness over not being there, remember that you're doing this for a cause; you're doing this to give your kids a real life. You're fighting a great battle, Mama!
Cherish every single moment you have with them. Even if you're tired, you're still fighting a great battle. You may not be able to provide quantity, but you're providing them quality time. You may never have time for yourself but you make time for them. You may feel like you're not doing enough but, Mama, you are MORE than enough. Your presence with them is of unmatchable importance and you're making it count! You're doing a great job!
Keep your chin up, Mama, because the days that you think you're only doing so-so, your kids think you're the greatest mom in the world. On the days when you think you slacked because you bought cookies instead of making them, your kids are proud to bring in something to donate to their classroom party. On the days when you're feeling defeated and you just throw a frozen pizza in the oven, your kids are excited that they get pizza for dinner. You are stronger and smarter and more wonderful than you can imagine. You are a great mom. You're doing great things!
Sincerely,
Me
************************
Dear Stay at Home Mom,
You're doing great! You probably wish you could have a break...even if it's just for a couple of hours. You're wishing that you could take a bath or go to the bathroom in peace just one time. In this, I feel your pain. I feel for you every single time that you have a moment of complete frazzled craziness and hit your breaking point. Every time you start to feel overwhelmed with stress, remember that you're doing this for a cause; you're doing this to give your kids a real life. You're fighting a great battle, Mama!
Cherish every moment you have with them. I know you're tired, Mama. I know you never get a break. I know you're juggling a million jobs and you almost never get the recognition that you truly deserve. I know that you're kicking butt and taking names and it feels like there's no reward for it besides the smiles of your kids....and more work. You may feel like you're not doing enough but Mama, you are MORE than enough. Your presence with them is of unmatchable importance and you're making it count! You're doing a great job!
Keep your chin up Mama, because the days that you think you're only doing so-so, your kids think you're the greatest mom in the world. On the days when you're sitting in a house full of unvacuumed carpet, dirty dishes, and piles of laundry and you feel like you've failed, you're looking at kids that have had true time filled with real life learning and bonding that they'd never get anywhere else. On the days when you're feeling exhausted and guilty for putting them in front of a movie just to get something done, they're excited that they get to watch a movie for no reason at all. You are stronger and smarter and more wonderful than you can imagine. You are a great mom. You're doing great things!
Sincerely,
Me
I think that both of these types of mamas need to hear this every now and then :)
You're doing great! You probably wish you didn't have to work or, at least, not so much. You probably wish that you could be at all of those functions at your kids' school or that you didn't miss a first word or step. In this, I mourn with you. I mourn the times that I miss with my kids just as much as you mourn your time lost. Every time you start to feel overwhelmed with sadness over not being there, remember that you're doing this for a cause; you're doing this to give your kids a real life. You're fighting a great battle, Mama!
Cherish every single moment you have with them. Even if you're tired, you're still fighting a great battle. You may not be able to provide quantity, but you're providing them quality time. You may never have time for yourself but you make time for them. You may feel like you're not doing enough but, Mama, you are MORE than enough. Your presence with them is of unmatchable importance and you're making it count! You're doing a great job!
Keep your chin up, Mama, because the days that you think you're only doing so-so, your kids think you're the greatest mom in the world. On the days when you think you slacked because you bought cookies instead of making them, your kids are proud to bring in something to donate to their classroom party. On the days when you're feeling defeated and you just throw a frozen pizza in the oven, your kids are excited that they get pizza for dinner. You are stronger and smarter and more wonderful than you can imagine. You are a great mom. You're doing great things!
Sincerely,
Me
************************
Dear Stay at Home Mom,
You're doing great! You probably wish you could have a break...even if it's just for a couple of hours. You're wishing that you could take a bath or go to the bathroom in peace just one time. In this, I feel your pain. I feel for you every single time that you have a moment of complete frazzled craziness and hit your breaking point. Every time you start to feel overwhelmed with stress, remember that you're doing this for a cause; you're doing this to give your kids a real life. You're fighting a great battle, Mama!
Cherish every moment you have with them. I know you're tired, Mama. I know you never get a break. I know you're juggling a million jobs and you almost never get the recognition that you truly deserve. I know that you're kicking butt and taking names and it feels like there's no reward for it besides the smiles of your kids....and more work. You may feel like you're not doing enough but Mama, you are MORE than enough. Your presence with them is of unmatchable importance and you're making it count! You're doing a great job!
Keep your chin up Mama, because the days that you think you're only doing so-so, your kids think you're the greatest mom in the world. On the days when you're sitting in a house full of unvacuumed carpet, dirty dishes, and piles of laundry and you feel like you've failed, you're looking at kids that have had true time filled with real life learning and bonding that they'd never get anywhere else. On the days when you're feeling exhausted and guilty for putting them in front of a movie just to get something done, they're excited that they get to watch a movie for no reason at all. You are stronger and smarter and more wonderful than you can imagine. You are a great mom. You're doing great things!
Sincerely,
Me
I think that both of these types of mamas need to hear this every now and then :)
Wednesday, September 9, 2015
My Opinions on Kim Davis
http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/judge-orders-kim-davis-freed-kentucky-jail-n423541
This is the story of Kim Davis. She's the clerk in a Kentucky town that gives marriage licenses to the residents. She's also a Christian. Since the legalization of gay marriage, she is still refusing to hand out marriage licenses to gay couples. However, she is not citing how state should have the right to decide this and protesting on these grounds. Oh no, she's using her religion as a reason to not do her job. She went to jail for six days because she refused to obey a court order and is now being treated as a saint after she was released though she's still hinting that she will disobey the court order. As a Christian, I have a few opinions on this.....
First of all, I understand that she disagrees with gay marriage. I, personally, am of the opinion that God doesn't call us to judge others just because they do things differently. God can absolutely tell us that something is a sin and we don't have to do it ourselves but that doesn't mean that we have to beat people over the head with a Bible. Ironically (and I only say that because it's not a widely accepted Christian view), I'm a gay marriage supporter. I don't believe it's a decision that the Federal Government should have been able to make; I believe it should have been a state to state decision BUT I support gay marriage overall. I do understand that she doesn't believe in it and I support her RIGHT to her opinion.
Secondly, I support a private business owner's right to refuse service to someone based on religious belief. I definitely believe that they can refuse to bake a cake or anything else. With that being said, I also believe that they will have to deal with the consequences of that decision including, but not limited to, protestors, awful reviews that lead people away from their business and other businesses outrightly using their limited views to boost businesses that will do those things. What I do NOT support is a public official choosing to not do their job because of their religious views.
Third, building on the last one, IT'S HER JOB! Job duties change regularly at many jobs. If you can't do what's required of you, leave your job. I'm very sorry that it's going to affect you negatively but if you feel that strongly about it, you shouldn't be doing it. That would be like a teacher refusing to teach what the school board approved just because they don't like it. Sorry, lady, it's your job. Do it or quit!
Fourth, she was NOT jailed for her religion. She was jailed because she expressly chose to go against a court order. No one is immune from the law. She CHOSE to go against what the judge ordered her to do and she was jailed for doing so. Then, they actually offered her a solution by taking her name off of the documents for ALL marriage certificates and now she's trying to argue that those licenses will not be valid because they lack her name on them (which may TECHNICALLY be true if it wasn't for the fact that the court is going to validate every one of those anyway).
Finally, her reaction when she got out (and the reaction of her lawyer), to me, is appalling. She looked like a kid that just got to keep the toy they just stole from the toy store. She pretty much flat said she's not going to go along with the court again and is willing to go back to jail. It's ridiculous to me that people are hailing her a hero. She could very easily get a different position OR agree with the peace offering the court offered. She's just being difficult and then smearing her religion all over it like a bear in a beehive.
Look, I understand there is a whole lot of Christian-shaming that seems to be going on. People lump us in with extremists that use our faith as a shield all the time. However, this case isn't about that. This case isn't about the fact that she is against something. She chose not to do her job and then she chose not to obey the court. Kim Davis isn't a hero. Period.
This is the story of Kim Davis. She's the clerk in a Kentucky town that gives marriage licenses to the residents. She's also a Christian. Since the legalization of gay marriage, she is still refusing to hand out marriage licenses to gay couples. However, she is not citing how state should have the right to decide this and protesting on these grounds. Oh no, she's using her religion as a reason to not do her job. She went to jail for six days because she refused to obey a court order and is now being treated as a saint after she was released though she's still hinting that she will disobey the court order. As a Christian, I have a few opinions on this.....
First of all, I understand that she disagrees with gay marriage. I, personally, am of the opinion that God doesn't call us to judge others just because they do things differently. God can absolutely tell us that something is a sin and we don't have to do it ourselves but that doesn't mean that we have to beat people over the head with a Bible. Ironically (and I only say that because it's not a widely accepted Christian view), I'm a gay marriage supporter. I don't believe it's a decision that the Federal Government should have been able to make; I believe it should have been a state to state decision BUT I support gay marriage overall. I do understand that she doesn't believe in it and I support her RIGHT to her opinion.
Secondly, I support a private business owner's right to refuse service to someone based on religious belief. I definitely believe that they can refuse to bake a cake or anything else. With that being said, I also believe that they will have to deal with the consequences of that decision including, but not limited to, protestors, awful reviews that lead people away from their business and other businesses outrightly using their limited views to boost businesses that will do those things. What I do NOT support is a public official choosing to not do their job because of their religious views.
Third, building on the last one, IT'S HER JOB! Job duties change regularly at many jobs. If you can't do what's required of you, leave your job. I'm very sorry that it's going to affect you negatively but if you feel that strongly about it, you shouldn't be doing it. That would be like a teacher refusing to teach what the school board approved just because they don't like it. Sorry, lady, it's your job. Do it or quit!
Fourth, she was NOT jailed for her religion. She was jailed because she expressly chose to go against a court order. No one is immune from the law. She CHOSE to go against what the judge ordered her to do and she was jailed for doing so. Then, they actually offered her a solution by taking her name off of the documents for ALL marriage certificates and now she's trying to argue that those licenses will not be valid because they lack her name on them (which may TECHNICALLY be true if it wasn't for the fact that the court is going to validate every one of those anyway).
Finally, her reaction when she got out (and the reaction of her lawyer), to me, is appalling. She looked like a kid that just got to keep the toy they just stole from the toy store. She pretty much flat said she's not going to go along with the court again and is willing to go back to jail. It's ridiculous to me that people are hailing her a hero. She could very easily get a different position OR agree with the peace offering the court offered. She's just being difficult and then smearing her religion all over it like a bear in a beehive.
Look, I understand there is a whole lot of Christian-shaming that seems to be going on. People lump us in with extremists that use our faith as a shield all the time. However, this case isn't about that. This case isn't about the fact that she is against something. She chose not to do her job and then she chose not to obey the court. Kim Davis isn't a hero. Period.
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