If you can't say something nice....

I'm relatively certain that most 20+ year old people in this country have heard the phrase...."Opinions are like assholes, everyone has one."  It's as true today as the first time that I heard it.  In fact, life experience makes it more true all of the time.  However, I am of the mind that there is such a thing as tact and that exercising it is an important part of being a productive member of society.  Here is my perspective....

Your opinions on things, when based on actual thought and education on the topic (as opposed to just going along with what others have to say) are part of what makes you a unique individual.  When you expand your mind and educate yourself about the world, people, and everything else, you are opening yourself up to the possibilities.  It's important to have opinions and viewpoints because it helps define you as an individual.

Debating opinions is healthy.  In fact, it's another way to educate yourself.  After all, how can you argue your perspective effectively if you don't know anything about the other side of the argument?  When done in a healthy manner, debate is good for the heart, soul and mind.  There are no physical attacks and words like "dumb" don't have to be used to describe things.  Saying that someone's opinion is dumb is an indication that you believe that they like dumb things which, in essence, makes them dumb.  It's not a nice word, period.

The fact is that too many people don't exercise tact when they debate issues.  You remember tact right?  It's the ability to express your opinion in a way that doesn't offend intentionally.  There will always be someone that is offended by your opinion.  The fact is that people define themselves wholeheartedly by their opinions sometimes, especially when it involves politics, religion or love.  Overall, though, people have the ability to exercise tact.  They choose not to.

Look, it doesn't make you a billy badass to call someone else's opinions or ideas "dumb" or "stupid" or "ridiculous."  It doesn't make you "honest" or "straight forward" or "blunt."  What it makes you is an asshole. You don't look stronger or more educated when you do this.  You look like an idiot that is not confident enough of their opinion to support it with real evidence.  If you have to verbally assault someone's opinion (or, worse yet, the person themselves), it means that you haven't educated yourself enough to back your thought process up.  Now who's the idiot?

I guess what it boils down to is the fact that too many people get off on walking around feeling like they need to just spew their verbal diarrhea on everyone all of the time.  They take pride in being a bitch (or an asshole) and they own the word like it's something to be searched for.  There was a time when it was considered a good thing to be able to keep your opinion to yourself unless the situation called for it.  It seems that our current world actually supports you throwing it out there, even when it's unnecessary.  I can't see how that is a healthy way to live.  Never practicing self-control is a dangerous thing.

The moral of my little rant is that there is a time and a place for expressing your opinion in a healthy way.  It is not when a person is trying to be positive and spread the love.  It is not when a person is mourning.  Keep your verbal run-ons where they belong and try to practice just a little of what your parents probably taught you....a little thing called TACT!

End of rant.

Checking in

I've taken a bit of a break from blogging in the understanding that I don't need to make it an every day thing unless I have the time.  In short, I don't need to stress myself out over blogging.  The day that someone offers me a paid blogging "job" is the day I need to focus all of my attention on this.

One of the great things I've been working on is getting my house in order.  I moved furniture last weekend and this weekend.  The girls room and the boys' rooms got switched and my bedroom is FINALLY set up the way I like it.  This past weekend was a hunt for a great new chair for the living room so we can give away the chairs that we've been wanting to get rid of.  I found a great cushy, squishy chair for $15 at Arc and it's delightful.  I'm definitely getting a feel for what I want to keep an eye out for.

My next big thing is my garden.  I finally transplanted and I've been babying the shit out of what I put in the ground.  Yes, it's a pain in the butt to figure out what each plant needs but it's so worth it to see it growing and thriving.  I've become a bit of an addict.  Every time I'm at Lowe's, I'm wandering through the plant section finding things to "rescue" from the clearance rack...cutting them back, babying them and watching them thrive.

I've also been focusing on refinishing the rocking chair I started awhile back.  I've been working on it for my little diva and finally got on the ball and got it most of the way sanded this weekend.  I still need to go over it one more time with a finer grain sand paper but it's a move in the right direction.

Finally, I've just been having fun...jet skis, lake beaches and just relaxing with the fam.  We broke out the Nintendo 64 last night for some Pac Man.  We've had movie nights outside.  It's just been a nice relaxing time.