Thursday, March 27, 2014

Women Aren't as Complicated as You'd like to Think

Sometimes, women just aren't as complicated as men think they are.  On the whole, women tend to be pretty uncomplicated, as it turns out.  Don't believe me?  Here are some of the bullet points for dealing with a woman (as noted in nearly every post, exceptions are possible but this stands for a majority of us).

1.  We just want to be heard.  Just like it is common knowledge that men have selective hearing, women would like you to focus for fifteen minutes on what we're saying so we know that we're actually being heard.  Just like men need longer periods of chill time sometimes where there is no noise, women need longer periods of listening when something is going on.  If you'd take that fifteen minutes and actually devote it to listening to us, we'd leave you alone and shut up so you can have your chill time.  Pretty simple.

2.  We're all dramatic to differing degrees....but you don't need to tell us that  Some of us tend to be less dramatic and some (ahem water signs) tend to be so overly dramatic that it's ridiculous.  The thing is, TELLING us that we're dramatic will just make us behave more dramatically.  And let's be honest, boys, you are just as dramatic as we are; just dramatic about different things.  Your wife may be flipping out over the toilet paper roll (dramatic) but it's important to her for things to be maintained.  How would you feel if someone left your video game controller out in the yard instead of maintaining it properly?

3.  We don't care if it makes sense or not.  Do NOT critique our appearance.  Wanna find a quick way to make a woman feel self-conscious?  Pick her apart physically.  When you make that choice, though, don't complain that women get jealous, bitter or down on themselves.  Let's pick a commonality for all men...your penis.  If your girlfriend made a comment about the size of your penis, you would never let it go.  You'd get mad, bitter and self conscious and likely angry if your wife compared your penis to someone else's.  Guess what?  We feel the same way.  Women are prone to self-consciousness and we don't need you aggravating it.

4.  We don't want to nag...so grow up.  There are a whole lot of men who complain about being nagged yet they want to act like teenagers and have their wives clean up after them.  Well guess what?  If I'm washing your dirty underwear, I have the right to complain about your clothes pile.  If I'm washing your dishes, I have the right to complain when you leave them wherever you want.  If you're going to act like a child, expect to be treated that way.  Nagging is not enjoyable to any of us, as a whole.  And while we're on the topic, you need to review your definition of "nag".  If you're uncertain, I have a few mother in laws that I know of that I could direct you to....it's a rite of passage for them to henpeck.

5.  The worst thing you can do to a woman is stop making her feel special.  Men complain that they can't read minds but it doesn't take a mind reader to flatter your girl.  Wanna know how I know?  Men do it when they're courting women.  Somewhere along the line, men (I've ripped on women before so don't think I'm being sexist here) forget to make their girlfriends and wives feel special.  Tell her she's beautiful.  Take her for a walk.  A little effort goes a long way in getting what you want and making your life more peaceful.

So you see, men?  It's pretty simple.  Maybe put a little bit of effort into maintaining the behavior you used when you were courting her and your relationship won't seem so "complicated."  Stop being dramatic and making it into something way more crazy complicated than it is.

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

What I Miss About Being a Stay at Home Mom

Although I love my job and have incredible boss families, there are a whole lot of things that I miss about being a stay at home mom.  There are generally two kinds of working moms (and NEITHER is better).  The first kind of working mom is thankful to get out of the house, enjoy her time away, and socialize in the work place.  This working mom is often known to say, "Even if I didn't HAVE to work, I'd still want to."  They've worked hard to get where they are and they enjoy what they do. They strike a balance that they're happy with between work and home life and their older children are accustomed to mommy working.  They're proud of what Mommy accomplishes and they are very matter of fact when they speak about Mommy's job. (Of course this is generalized and, yes, there are always exceptions).
The second kind of working mom is working only because she has to.  It's not to lead a lavish lifestyle or to party.  This working mom would stay home if she had the chance.  This working mom leaves the house every day wanting to be there with her kids.  Does she enjoy her job and the break? Probably.  Does she relish in some of the perks of being a working mom like getting breaks?  Probably.  Does she love getting to see the happy faces of the kids running towards her when she walks in/picks them up?  Yes!  Would she trade all of that to be the one that's with them all of the time?  Definitely.  This is the kind of working mom category that I fall into.
With all of that being said, here are some of the things I miss about being a stay at home mom:

1.  TIME.  Ah precious time.  I miss not having the ability to put things off for an hour.  I have to accomplish things in such a short time span when I'm not working.  Everything is crammed into a couple of hours in the morning and a couple of hours at night.  I miss having the wiggle room to move things around and do "this" now and "that" later.  Right now I have to smash "this" and "that" into a fifteen minute period and it's no longer about getting it right...it's about getting it done.

2.  THE OPPORTUNITY FOR MORE QUALITY TIME:  By the time I get home at night, it's homework and dinner and showers and bed.  Yes, I have my weekends but those are generally spent, at least in part, running around doing the things I didn't have the time to do during the week.  It's a vicious circle.  I miss having the ability to go volunteer at their school more.  I miss having the ability to go shoot some photos for a friend just because.  I miss having the ability to fit in workouts without worrying about damaging my health by getting even LESS sleep.  I miss being the one to say, "C'mon guys.  Let's stay on task and get this homework done."  I miss being the one that sets up the sprinkler for them and then snaps shots of them gleefully running through in the summer.  I miss the quality time.

3.  COOKING FOOD FROM SCRATCH MORE OFTEN:  I miss this most of all, I think, because it combined quality time, health and something I actually love to do.  I miss cooking from scratch all of the time.  I loathe having to cook quick meals.  I miss making homemade cinnamon rolls or buttermilk biscuits or bread....dear Lord, homemade bread!  I miss it!  It's healthier, often more budget friendly and it's soooo worth it.

4.  BEING THE ONE THAT'S HOME WITH THEM WHEN THEY'RE SICK.  I know.  It's ironic to miss this but it's true.  I miss being the one that cuddles them and brings them ramen or empties their puke buckets.  I miss being the one who rewets their washcloth to make sure it's keeping their little heads cool.  I miss that!

5.  BEING ABLE TO BE SPONTANEOUS.  Yes, I'm a planner to the core, but I miss being able to pick up and go get ice cream with the kids without worrying about disrupting their schedules and them not getting enough sleep for school the next dy.  I miss being able to say, "Screw it...let's do the zoo today."  I miss it!

If someone offered me the opportunity tomorrow to still bring in enough income, be financially stable and be self-employed (work from home) or be a stay at home mom, I think I'd yank it up immediately.  You see, I love my job but I love my family more :)

Oh the Utter Cuteness

Behold...the utter cuteness of Baby K






Monday, March 24, 2014

He's NOT Scatterbrained

I recently spoke with some moms of children living with ADHD and was actually a bit disturbed at their descriptions of their children.  As a parent of a child with ADD (mild hyperactivity) and a child with ADHD and SPD, I kind of have some opinions on things.  I understand and support that people have different parenting approaches but the descriptions really bugged me.  So here are a few little nuggets of information from the perspective of an ADHD/SPD parent....

1.  STOP expecting your child to behave "normally."  First off, normal is relative and children without diagnoses are quirky too.  Your child's brain works differently than some other kids.  Imagine sitting on your computer and opening about 55 windows at the same time.  Your computer would have to work extra hard to even "focus" on one window because there's so much going on in the background.  THAT is what the mind of an ADHD child is like.  Now imagine that every time you opened a window on the computer, your keyboard shocked you or sent a skunk odor or made an airhorn noise but you never knew which one it'd be.  That's what Sensory Processing children live with.  If all of that was going on in your brain, would you remember every little thing told to you.  Doubtful!

2.  Your child is NOT scatterbrained or ditzy.  Stop using negative terminology like that.  It's one thing to say they're in their own little world.  They are.  That doesn't sound negative, for the most part.  It's another thing to label them as scatterbrained, ditzy, or lacking common sense.  Refer back to #1.

3.  While medication is a solution for some people, it is not always the solution for everyone.  Don't judge a parent's approach until you live their daily life.  I don't medicate my children but I know and support people that make that choice for the well being of their child.  Some choose herbal or dietary changes.  Some, like me, focus on dietary and behavior modification.  It's a matter of choice and children's individual needs.  With that being said, I don't think that piling on medication on medication on medication is going to help.  Adding more pills won't make your child "normal." 

4.  And FINALLY, punishing your child for "not remembering" or "getting off task" won't help.  Period.  Positive reinforcement is the only solution here.  You have to keep trying to find what HELPS them to more efficiently focus on the task at hand.  Different kids, different approaches but punishing and yelling for them forgetting things or getting off task will only make things worse because now you're making them feel inferior and stupid.

I could go on for days but this really grinds my gears.  Stop treating your children as if they're not living up to your standards.  They're not the asshole here.  You are. *Rant over*

Saturday, March 22, 2014

Open Letter to Critical Parents & Other Assholes

Dear Critical Parents (& Other Assholes),

You know who you are.  You are the people that make other parents feel like they're doing something wrong at every turn.  You are the people who find something to pick at no matter what the case.  You are the people who take every opportunity to put someone else down while you are sitting on your self-made pedestal.  You are the bullies who never outgrew their mean girl complex and the mean-spirited people who rally the troops in hatred instead of support.  You are cruel, though you claim to be a victim.  You are hurtful, though you claim to be indifferent.  You assume positions of "authority" so that you can lord over others and reach more people in your quest for hatred and strife.  You are the cause of our bullying and mean girls generation coming up today.  You entitle your children to treat others the way that you treat your peers and you give them the same rose-colored glasses that you view your world through.  You are an asshole.

You should know that people see who you are.  You think that you've got everyone fooled but you don't.  There are those that are too afraid to stand up to you because you're intimidating in your ploy for power.  They are afraid that you will spread ugliness against them too.  They are afraid that you'll make their children's lives miserable.  They are afraid that you'll make them your next target. BUT there are also those of us that aren't afraid.  We don't care about the ugly things you say because they're words and the people that truly know us know that we aren't any of the things that you say about us.  We know that true friends will defend us regardless of your words and people that aren't seeking the drama to begin with won't care what you say.  They won't care about your lies.  They won't care about your put-downs because they are leading their own lives and they know, unlike you, that karma comes back around to bite you.  It always comes back around.

You should know that your behavior says more about you than us.  Your mean words and actions say more about nothing about who we are and everything about the kind of heart you have.  Your constant ability to find reasons to criticize everyone don't reflect badly on those that you criticize; it reflects on you.  You find a way to put down working mothers for not volunteering enough yet those same mothers are emailing teachers to make sure they're on top of things and their children are well-reputed in all of their classes.  You find ways to put down the stay at home moms that aren't contributing enough but what you don't know is that those same mothers are working on projects at home or holding down the fort so they can be there when their children walk in the door.  You find ways to attack those that you call your friends in secret yet turn and smile at them while you criticize others openly.  You are a coward and a bully.  You don't feel good about who you are so you find ways to try to bring others to your level. You are afraid that if you show any vulnerability, they'll realize that you aren't as scary or powerful as you make yourself out to be.  You're just like everyone else.

You should know that karma always comes back to bite people...always.  What you are putting out is going to come back to you times ten (or a hundred).  Every mean word you speak about these people that are doing their best is going to come back to haunt you in one form or another.  Every troop you rally against that helpless person you're criticizing is going to be rallied against you.  Every judgment you cast down will be cast upon you.  The friends you stab in the back (that don't realize it) will stab you in the back. 

You should know that the company you keep can quickly change and that your friends may not continue to be your friends when they realize that you are not who you proclaim to be.  It's a common thread for people to say that you can tell who your real friends are, not when you are in the best of times but when you are in the worst of times.  When you're at rock bottom, your cronies will walk away and find someone else.  You won't have true friends because you have treated everyone inferior to yourself.

Finally, you should know that you are on top right now but there will be a bottom.  It won't come because the rest of us cause it and it won't come because we treat you the way you are treating us.  It will come because life throws you curve balls.  It will come because what goes up must come down.  Sadly, though you treat us as your minions, we will still be there because our hearts are kind.  We may not be your friend but we'll be your supporter if you want to change.  We'll accept your apologies and try to help you be better person if that is what you seek but the change must come from within you and with a genuine heart.  You see, our hearts are loving and we don't seek to hurt or break down others; we seek to build each other up and support each other, even in our different approaches.  There are more of us than you realize and we are done letting you make us feel inferior.  You, too, will hit rock bottom one day and you will see what we have seen...and it will hurt your heart in ways that you can't imagine.

Sincerely,
The Fed Up People You Treat Like Crap

My Review of the Downtown Aquarium in Denver

(Disclaimer: This is strictly my opinion. This is not a general statement nor am I affiliated with or representing anyone with this opinion.)

I went on a trek to the Downtown Aquarium in Denver for the first time yesterday, in search of a unique experience.  Having grown up in the Chicago area, Shedd Aquarium was the aquarium I was accustomed to.  I was living near Atlanta when Atlanta Aquarium opened its doors and went to that aquarium as well. I've also visited aquariums in several other states. I had never visited an aquarium, though, where the restaurant is such a large part of the aquarium experience.  I have both pros and cons of the experience.

LOCATION:  The aquarium is in an amazing location. I am a little bit biased but I love Downtown Denver.  Though the parking was a bit steep ($7.00) for the amount of time that someone that is walking the aquarium path just once, it is not outrageous for the price of parking in other parts of Denver.  In addition, the parking lots were well-maintained with conveniently located sidewalks and a comfortable walking distance to the aquarium itself.  The location in reference to the highway was perfect.  No uncomfortable one way streets to navigate.  Get off the highway and get ready to park.  I found it to be incredibly convenient and a great place to be able to send out-of-towners without them having to use Google Maps to find their way through busy city streets.

CLEANLINESS/UPKEEP:  As with most attractions that I have visited in Denver, the aquarium was maintained very well.  The facility was clean, inside and out. The architecture was incredible, eye-catching and fun.  The restrooms were well maintained and located in convenient locations throughout.  Thumbs up to the staff for their great job keeping things up for the patrons.

STAFF:  I found the staff to be incredibly kind.  From the ticket sales person to the photographer (souvenir snapshots) and everyone in between, everyone was courteous, helpful and ready to help make the museum experience fun and educational.  I personally witnessed them speaking with children on field trips with a level of patience that some day care educators would be envious of.  There was not a person that I ran into that didn't seem to enjoy their job to an optimum level.

GENERAL ADMISSION PRICING:  I am a bit divided on this one.  If you are planning on eating at the restaurant, the $17.99 for adult admission is definitely worth the price.  I would also venture to say that if you are able to linger at the exhibits and observe for awhile (alone or with older children who have attention spans and interest in the experience), it is well worth the admission price.  This extends to those that are willing to walk through the path more than once to see exhibits over again.  After all, these are living, breathing creatures that will never give you the exact same experience twice.  If you are the parent of an infant or toddler that you are just bringing out to "see the fishies", my recommendation would be to wait until they are a bit older.  Though children 1 year and under are free, you are still going to have to pay for your admission and children with short attention spans are likely to not enjoy this experience nearly as much as your $18 asks.

MEMBERSHIP:  Obviously I didn't buy a membership this trip but I examined the memberships rather closely at the aquarium and online.  If you are a family of four, the $159 for the Captain's Level Membership seems to be a very reasonable price for unlimited admission for a year (especially when the general admission price is so high).  Though it doesn't include free parking, it does reduce your parking price to $3.50 which is less than a coffee from most major latte chains.  It includes a 4D Theater Value Ticket, guest passes (4 total), priority seating in the restaurant and discounts on several different levels. 
The Admiral's Membership, at $199 for a family of four, is reasonably priced.  It offers the same perks as the Captain's Level but ups the amount of guest passes to eight and gives you discounts on up to four adult entrees at several different restaurants in Colorado.  Incredible deal for those that dine out regularly.  You still don't get free parking, but your parking price is still half off.
Now here's the drawback...for large families that are already on a budget, it would be an additional $25/person to add on memberships for the other two people in the household.  Unlike a large portion of family-friendly places that offer memberships, it is NOT all of the children within your household included.  It was not clearly listed whether adding the other two people on for that price would include discounts within the restaurant for the additional people as well.  The price has now moved rom $159 to $209 for my family's membership, which is nearly double the price of a membership to most zoos and museums in the area which offer free parking to visitors.  In a nutshell, if you're a small family, GREAT value.  If you're a large family, you might be better off getting a membership to the zoo and making the aquarium an occasional visit.

ADD-ONS:  The restaurant's food was incredible and well worth the visit for those that are looking for a unique experience.  4D tickets were not outrageously priced nor were the tickets for the Aquarium express train or the carousel.  At the end of your trek, there was a plethora of activity from face painting to pictures with the mermaids (which I will get to in a moment) to feeding the stingrays.  All things considered, the prices were actually very reasonable and well worth the price for something unique.

EXHIBITS:  I was actually quite impressed with the variety of animals in the exhibits.  The layout was well thought out and the exhibits offered a very up close and personal experience.  Creature views are accessible from strollers for the youngsters being toted along in such accommodations.  Getting to see snakes and tigers was a pleasant surprise.  In addition, the flash flood experience was a very neat "hands on" way for kids and adults alike to learn about this weather phenomenon.   Getting to see the divers feeding the fish (and other creatures) was incredible and the mermaids were a fun addition to the experience.  I was, personally, a fan of the seahorse and jellyfish exhibits though the shark area was a pretty incredible sight to see, as well.  The children seemed to flock to the shark area with floor to ceiling viewing and viewing portals in the floor as well.  The exhibits seemed very true to the animal's natural habitat and allowed easy viewing without having to stand on tippy toes.

UNIQUE FROM OTHER AQUARIUMS:  The mermaids add a delightful spin to this aquarium.  For children, this is a magical experience and a nice treat of eye candy for the dads coming in.  In addition, the tigers were a pleasant surprise, though it seems a bit out of place for an aquarium experience.  The aforementioned flash flood experience is an incredible and fun way to learn and the various "port holes" where kids can stick their heads "in" the exhibits are a phenomenal add-on.

BOTTOM LINE:  The bottom line is pretty simple.  For the family with infants and toddlers only, I'd say stay home or pick another Denver excursion (as the choices are plentiful).  For the family with preschoolers on up, this is a great experience.  If you're visiting, make the choice to dine in the restaurant and take your time in the exhibits to get the optimum bang for your buck.  If you're a local, the membership might be worth your money for a small family.

Will I be returning to the Aquarium?  That remains to be seen but I would definitely not turn down the opportunity to explore this site again in the future.







Thursday, March 20, 2014

24 Hours

It's amazing the difference that 24 hours can make.  On Tuesday, I was feeling a bit ill; nauseous but not exceptionally bad.  Over Tuesday night was a different story. I was up all night with vomiting and diarrhea, unable to sleep at all because of my tummy troubles.  The whole day on Wednesday was spent feeling awful.  Unable to sleep because of a monster headache.  My body ached all over so badly that it hurt to move.  I couldn't get comfortable in a non-nauseous position except on my back with an ice pack on my head and a heating pad on my back.  The problem was that in that position I couldn't sleep.  I could barely keep down anything except popsicles, Gatorade (which I am not a fan of), and three or four bites of broth.  It was awful.

By the time my fiancé got home last night, I was not in a good place.  I was almost in tears because I was tired and uncomfortable and just wanted to sleep.  Thankfully, he's an amazing guy and not only did he fix me some soup but he also rubbed down my back with icy hot, brought me an ice pack and laid with me until I fell asleep.  He also got up in the middle of the night with my youngest as she woke up vomiting last night.  The ability to sleep pretty much a full eight hours was exactly what I needed.  I woke up feeling much better.  I'm not 100% but I'm definitely at least 70% which is good enough for work!

24 hours made a huge difference between Tuesday morning and Wednesday morning and then between Wednesday morning and today.  Now my fingers are crossed that my other ones either get this bug quickly or don't get it at all.

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Sacrifice & Great Ideas

There is a large portion of my life that is spent not being able to pay for the great ideas I have.  I have amazing ideas of things that I want to build or do.  I have incredible ideas of all of these things that I want to accomplish.  Yet, most of my life is spent trying to find ways to finance things.  I'm not complaining at all.  I'm very blessed.  It's just my lot in life.

As a working mom, there is always this part of me that cringes and cries inside when I have to miss my children's school events.  I got a notification the other day of my daughter being involved in an awards ceremony....that's during school hours.  Guess who works during those hours?  Bummer, huh?  She was so disappointed that it made me sad and made me feel like a failure on some level.  I have to work to help support our household but it's events like this that make me sad about that part of my life.

So what is there to do?

I guess the biggest part is to understand that sacrifice is essential in life.  It's not something we like or it wouldn't be called "sacrifice."  I may not be able to make it to the awards but we can have a fun dinner and take pictures at home WITH her awards.  We can still celebrate; just not at the school.  There is compromise to be had and there is still celebration in the great moments and sadness in the sad moments but God is good and I am blessed and remembering that is remembering that I don't have to be able to do everything, as long as I can do something.

Thursday, March 13, 2014

Football Heaven

As a sports nut and Broncos fan, I am going crazy over the recent additions (and subtractions) from the Broncos roster.  First off, let me give a sad (for me) but happy (for him) send-off to Mr Eric Decker.  You will always have a place in my heart Mr Decker and I'm glad you didn't go to a team I loathe (aka the Raiders, Ravens, etc).  I'm sure you will get ample playing time for the Jets and, while I'm sad to see you go, I'm sure it'll be a great fit for you.  Good luck in your endeavors...just don't plan on winning any Superbowls with them. (Hahahaha)

Next, Champ Bailey.  While I was sad to see him released, he will always be a Bronco and it was time for him to go.  Contrary to some other GM's, Elway definitely knows what he's doing and he's assembling a Superbowl-worthy team.  I was also sad to see Zane Beadles and Wesley Woodyard go.  Amazing players that I know will do great with another team.  It's just not their time here anymore.

And finally...on to the additions. 

DeMarcus Ware, Aqib Talib, TJ Ward, Andre Caldwell....this is going to be an amazing season.  Elway has definitely got it down...we're amping up our defense and perfecting our offense this year.  It is going to be an incredible season and I can't wait to go to the Superbowl...and win this time :)

Hump Day Post

My apologies for forgetting to post this yesterday.  I wanted to do a final lookover and completely zoned out on the actual post.  Today I'm going to give a little lesson on Driving Etiquette.  Lesson of the Day? Merging.

When merging onto the highway, there are a few things to remember:

1.  You are merging INTO traffic.  It is NOT their responsibility to speed up or slow down to accommodate you. Yes, there are some of us that are polite enough to move over when possible or attempt to accommodate you but it is not our responsibility.  It is a courtesy we do when possible...or when the wind hits us right.

2.  On the heels of number one, YOU need to speed up (or slow down) to go with the flow of traffic.  That is what the on-ramp is for...getting up to speed.  That is what your mirrors are for...to see what's going on around you that you cannot see by just looking.  If you see someone speeding up, don't jump in front of them at 35 mph

3.  Once you've merged, it is NOT the time to check your Facebook or change your radio station, causing you to slow down as you fiddle.  You are on the HIGHWAY....DRIVE!

With those three things in mind, let's give a lesson on what you should be doing to merge.  Using the on-ramp, get up to speed while simultaneously looking at the traffic you're going into using your mirrors and traditional looking.  (We'll cover bumper to bumper traffic in a minute).  Using good judgment, find a gap that would accommodate your car comfortably and pace your speed so as not to cut anyone off but to glide gently into the space that's there.  Stay up to speed with the flow of traffic and drive...undistracted.

Now let's take a moment to cover bumper to bumper traffic....In bumper to bumper traffic (aka rush hour), merging is a bit different.  While you don't have to get up to speed, you are required to exercise just as much vigilance.  Merging into rush hour traffic is much like shuffling a deck of cards:  highway driver, merging driver, highway driver, merging driver and so on.  Don't be the butthead that tries to push your way in behind another merging driver because you can't wait one car's length.  You are not getting anywhere any faster doing it and you're just ticking off the cars around you.

Driving is a lot like sex (particularly rush hour driving and merging).  Merging is best completed with ample foreplay (or in the case of driving, paying attention to what's going on) so as not to go in without preparation/lubrication.  Honking is much like premature ejaculation: it isn't fun, it doesn't make me go any faster and it's frustrating for both of us.  Exercise some manners when you're driving and there might not be so many frustrated people on the road.

Rant over.

Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Hockey Heaven

I am in hockey heaven right now.  I thought I was treating my amazing fiancé to something special for his birthday.  He'd never been to a hockey game ON his birthday before and I managed to score tickets (thank you stubhub) at a really reasonable price on the club level.  I set them aside a couple of months ago and we looked forward to the game but had no idea how special the night would truly be...

When we got to the Pepsi Center, we handed the attendant our tickets and he said, "Right past those ropes and up the escalator."  I should explain that we have a non-floor-ticket policy, in general...too hard to keep track of the game if you're behind an inconsiderate fan unless you're up against the glass.  We've always been limited to the third tier because we assumed it was the only option.  I say that to say this...we've found our new ticket home. Going beyond the velvet ropes, having no lines for concessions or restrooms, and seeing how polite and helpful everyone is while having the food and drinks actually be cheaper than most things on the upper level means we're in love.

The game was completely different from our seats and we were already in heaven.  Avs won in overtime and it was incredible.  Then came the best part.  We walked down to where they were having an event called "Hockey in Heels" on the ice and....WE WENT OUT ON THE ICE.  Not only out on the ice (in my hooker boots, by the way), but in the penalty box, on the bench, center ice....OH.....MY.......GOD.  It was incredible.

The hockey hangover I have this morning (due to 3.5 hours of sleep) is so worth it.  Only thing that could have made it better was meeting the players.  Now to do it at Sports Authority......

Monday, March 10, 2014

A Monday Thought :)

Today marks a very exciting day for me in more ways than one.  Not only do I start back into the wonderful world of nanny-share but I also get the privilege of taking my fiancé out for a birthday hockey game.  I confess, the stress of everyday "grrr" moments has gotten the best of me a few times lately: car troubles, school mumbo jumbo, work, family, and just trying to take care of myself in the midst of a million different things happening.  With all of that being said, I feel very blessed to have my little family and to celebrate life in the million and one ways that are ahead of us.  We've had our share of ups and downs but our family is strong and the hard stuff brings us closer together.  I honestly believe that God has some great things in store for our family and for me personally!

Birthday Weekend!



Unique


Let's make this short and sweet for a catch up post from Saturday...Kids are very different.  Some are more quiet, some are more loud.  Some are big eaters and some are picky.  Some are serious and some are funny.  If we take a moment to drop the "create a cookie cutter" parenting that is shoved down our throats and truly let them be who they are, we can get a clear picture of their unique personalities.  Let them stand out from the crowd!

Friday, March 7, 2014

Fun Friday Post

I'm going to cover a lot of area in this post so bear with me.  First of all, let's talk Broncos.  Champ Bailey was released this week from the Denver Broncos which I have very mixed feelings about.  Yes, he was an incredible player but I think he has reached the point at which it was more beneficial for us to let him go.  Sad?  Yes.  Clearly John Elway can move mountains when given the chance so I'm trusting him on this one....and hopefully on Decker.  Decker is a completely different story, though.  Admittedly, I'm biased as he is my favorite Bronco (though Welker is running a very close second) but I do think that taking a pay cut/staying at the same pay would be beneficial to both Decker and the Broncos.  He'd be on a Superbowl winning team in 2015 so the pay cut really would be a moot matter at that point.  Bottom line?  It is football season yet?
Now let's cover hockey.  My team fell last night to the Avalanche.  Am I sad?  Yes.  Here's the pros:  At least we lost in overtime, fought hard, and lost to a truly good team.  To the Avs (who I root for when they're NOT playing my team), you win this one.  I guess we're even for the season.  They truly deserved the win.  This year, they truly are the better team, in my opinion.

On to another topic, photography and how much I love it.  If there was a job that just allowed me to pack up my kids and travel to different destinations, photographing them, I'd be happy.  Editing at home with my crazies where I could still be with them.  Getting to be a stay at home mom even though I'd be working....phenomenal.  It's a dream that would truly have to be designed by God though.  Here are a few pictures from my trip to the zoo yesterday....




Thursday, March 6, 2014

Lifestyle Changes

I recently decided to work with a friend and make some healthier choices for my life.  While I don't believe in diets (I believe in lifestyle changes), I am modifying my habits to be a healthier me.  There are a few things that I've looked at and said, "Nah, it won't make a difference" and (much to my disappointment), I realized that I've been costing myself my health by making some of the choices I've made.

1.  I stopped drinking soda.  That's not to say I won't indulge now and then but I stopped drinking it on a daily basis.  Immediately, I noticed the difference.  I won't say that I didn't guzzle water constantly to prevent a caffeine withdrawal headache but I was less tired in the afternoon (when I normally drink it), felt less icky, and was able to easily replace the sugars I normally use to balance my glucose level (as a hypoglycemic) with alternatives.

2.  I started eating salads for lunch.  I try to add a protein source to my salad every day (turkey, chicken, egg, etc) but I've been eating salad for lunch and even throwing in spinach (raw spinach = gag).  No, I don't use fat free, low-cal dressing but I've replaced a meal that used to be extremely carb-rich with something less fattening.

3.  I started working out again...even if I only get in 20 minutes...that's SOMETHING!  I'm not strict on myself for what or when as long as I do it.

4.  I take the cat nap if I need it.  10 minutes can make all of the difference.

I look forward to posting more on how the changes have affected the way I feel!

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Role Models and Heroes...Not Idols

I was reading a blog post yesterday about the "dangers" of letting your kids see Disney child stars as a role model because a good portion of them go on to become "druggies, whores, and idiots."  While I admire the tenacity of the writer and while I believe that everyone is entitled to his or her opinion, I fervently disagree with this on several different accounts.  I agree with the sentiment but I think that something is lost in translation when you make accusations like the above-quoted.  Instead of coming across as someone trying to give advice or make a general statement to better the world, you come across as a religious kook that is making a very general statement about a very specific group that stands only partially true to that group.  In short, you are saying that an entire apple tree is not just spoiled by a bad apple but that you shouldn't eat from any fruit trees in the orchard because one tree has bad apples.

Yes, Disney child stars have their negative attributes as adults.  Actually, that is a general statement: some Disney child stars go on to make really poor decisions and have really negative attributes.  Then again, a lot of child stars deal with this because they're thrust into a very unrealistic life at a very young age and spoiled by those around them.  Some of them are lucky enough to have family and friends that keep them grounded.  Others are not so fortunate.  However, saying that all Disney child stars turn into "druggies, whores, and idiots" is an unfair statement.  They make mistakes like a lot of people do when they're in their late teens and early twenties.  The only difference is that their lives are so highly publicized that every mistake they made is made into a front page article on how they're wrecking their lives.  I'm not condoning their behavior; they truly are make really poor choices sometimes.  However, their choices are not all that different from the choices that a healthy portion of America's youth make at those ages.  There's also the truth that these stars are not all making poor choices like this.  Some of them are actually making incredibly good choices for their lives but these choices aren't publicized because the American' public loves drama.

With all of that being said, I think that it is perfectly safe to allow your kids to look up to Disney stars as long as they understand that they're human.  Yes, that's right....even celebrities are human.  I don't think that kids should ever be taught or encouraged to idolize any celebrity based on how famous, pretty, or trendy they are.  I think that children should be encouraged to look deeper and realize that there are far more important qualities than physical appearance and popularity.  If they are looking up to someone, they should be looking up to people that serve the community, use their talents wisely, treat others with dignity and respect, and further their education in whatever fashion they choose.  There is nothing wrong with looking up to anyone that exhibits these qualities.  It teaches children about the important things in life instead of looking solely at appearance.

In terms of saying it's dangerous, that depends on your approach.  If you are encouraging your child to model themselves after anyone, it can turn dangerous very quickly.  People are human; they make mistakes.  Kids should be taught to use their talents and their positive attributes in a productive way instead of trying to do what a celebrity is doing.  They should be taught that everyone is an individual and everyone has unique abilities that would do wonders in the world.  It's not about modeling themselves after anyone; it's about realizing that they have a lot to offer to the world without ever having to try to be someone else.

So perhaps these bloggers need to stop criticizing how terrible these people are and look at how they're parenting their children.  Perhaps if they encourage their children not to have "idols" but to have real role models and heroes, they won't find it necessary to pick apart those in the public eye quite as much.

Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Happy Birthday Syd




I think someone was happy to get her electric guitar for her birthday!
 
Can't believe she's 8....where the heck did the time go?

By the Time You Have Your Fourth Child....

My grandmother told me that by the time I got around to my fourth child hitting certain milestones, I'd probably handle it very differently out of knowledge, experience, and...well out of exhaustion.  She couldn't have been more right.  I think that there are certain things that you just don't understand, as a parent, unless you have three or more children in close age proximity.  So as a salute to moms of three or more, here is my list of things that stand true with a large family.

By the Time You Have Your Third, Fourth or Fifth Child...
*If you have more than five, God bless you on your journey...Ha ha ha

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you worry less about whether or not they got bathed at 7:00 every single night and worry more about the fact that they got bathed when they were dirty or smelled.  You don't make excuses for why your child newborn hasn't been bathed in two days; you recognize that she's a newborn...how dirty could she possibly get in two days.  You're often inclined to do the "no-funny-business" bath time (instead of the 20 minutes of designated play time you made sure to enact with your first one) and are equally as happy to use a wet washcloth or even a baby wipe to complete the task if a real bath isn't necessary.  You are also not opposed to throwing two, three or even four kids in the tub at once if it means getting your job done more expeditiously.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you've given up on tediously stain sticking every single item of clothing.  You realize that "spit happens" and understand that your baby is not the only one at the day care with formula stains.  You realize that it's not nearly as important to worry about every little stain being scrubbed pre-wash as it is to get the laundry done at all.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you've given up on keeping up with all of the housework all of the time.  You understand that it's significantly more important to have a happy, cluttered house than a spotless house with neglected children.  You understand that naptime cleaning can only do so much and you do your best with the time that you have.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you understand that your bathroom habits are no longer your own.  Not only can you not have a moment of peace in the bathroom but your bathroom habits will now be broadcast for all to see.  You might even stop closing the door to the bathroom with the understanding that the kids are going to open it anyway.  At the very least, you anticipate that the moment you sit down to pee, your kids are going to need to ask you something important....like whether or not turtles have ears.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, they can sleep damn near anywhere.  You have long since given up on them sleeping in a crib or play pen.  You have given up on the theory that you don't want to have them nap on you or on the floor.  Instead, you're just happy that they're napping and sleeping at all.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you understand that sometimes sweets and junk food are a necessary evil.  You can limit it in your home but they are going to get invited to parties and drink soda..and it's not the end of the world.  Your child will not melt into a puddle from enjoying the occasional McDonald's French fry.  You are no longer opposed to the idea that sweets can be used as bribery, if necessary.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, the phrase "this is not a restaurant" becomes standard in your household.  When your first child looks at you in disgust, you find creative ways to hide the veggies in their food, give them creative dips to dip it in, and read up on how you are supposed to get them to eat.  By number four, you've given up and just say "Eat it because I said so."

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you're used to the phrase "Are they all yours?" when you're out in public.  If your sense of humor is like mine, you're used to it to the point that you have your own creative responses.  Observe...."Are they all yours?"  "What do you mean all"  I only came in here with one....where the heck did these ones come from?" 

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you've given up on looking like the put-together mom all of the time.  You're just as happy rockin your ponytail and yoga pants to drop the kids off at school as you are to have that peaceful ten minutes in between their bedtime and yours.  It's fun to get dressed up once in awhile but you understand that you don't have to look like executive Barbie every time you step out of the door.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you're a multitasking extraordinaire.  You can comfort a crying toddler while nursing a newborn, coloring with your  preschooler and practicing spelling words with your school aged child.  You laugh mockingly at the idea of not carrying in all the groceries at once with the diaper bag, your purse, AND the ice creams  you bought to bribe the kids to behave in the grocery store while you figured out the unit price and whether or not the coupons were worth it.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you have accepted that that you are destined to no longer carry purse until everyone is out of diapers.  You are also no longer destined to have the sweet little diaper bags moms of one (or even two) have the privilege of carrying.  You throw your wallet into your suitcase sized diaper bag by the "emergency rations" of granola bars and fruit snacks and call it a day.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you have trained your kids on holding your hand in parking lots and behaving while you unload the baby.  You don't need "safe spots" on your car because your kids know that you mean business when you say to stand RIGHT HERE while you get the baby out of the car.  They know better than to run off in stores because your level of nonsense acceptance when it comes to these things has become less and less with each child.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, unsolicited parenting advice deflects off of you like it's a superpower.  Not only do you not have time for it but you've also realized and own the fact that your instincts are stronger and better than any book and you know your children better than some teeny bopper psych student with no children.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you accept that there are certain things you can't force a child to do....like potty train before they're ready.  You can sit and obsess over the fact that your toddler is still waddling around in a diaper or you can concentrate on the fact that he happily eats everything including hummus and speaks in full sentences that most adults can't put together anymore.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you've learned the ropes on tantrums...and by "the ropes", I mean that all children throw tantrums at some point.  Some are more dramatic and loud while others are more quiet and mellow but they all do it.  Acknowledging it has become so run-of-the-mill to you that when your youngest starts one, you know exactly what to do...or not do...which is to try to reason with them

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you realize that while children are actual little people, they are sometimes not ones that can be reasoned with.  Even more importantly, you understand that there are times that you shouldn't have to reason with them.  No means no.  I'm the mom.  Period.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you realize that the Mother's Curse is a real thing.  "I hope you have a child just like you" becomes not just what you live, but also what you inflict on your child...that is exactly like you.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you realize that you don't divide your love with an increased amount of children.  Your love simply multiplies....and you don't need a reason or explanation of how this happens because you're busy handling your four children.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you've given up on a spotless little sedan.  You now drive a minivan, a mom-mobile, complete with French fries stuffed in the seats and crayons melted in the cup holders.  You don't feel bad about your mom-mobile; you embrace it because you have enough trunk/storage space to haul around a body, like the body of the next person who mocks your mom-mobile.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you've given up on the concept that your children will "never" do something....like watch more than a half hour of TV a week...or run around naked singing the theme from "Dora the Explorer" while you try to cook a balanced meal.  You've learned to pick your battles.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you come to the conclusion that not everything in life can be equal but there are priorities in equality.  Priorities might include portions of dessert, number of Easter eggs collected, or who gets to take the Box Tops to their class.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you are so used to the phrase "that's not fair" that you no longer even acknowledge it.  Your oldest will likely complain that the younger kids get to do something or get away with something.   Your youngest will complain that they don't get the same privileges as the oldest.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, your organizational skills are comparable to professional organizers.  You can pack an entire nursery into a diaper bag, pack nutritious balanced lunches in under 10 minutes, and still manage to get everyone out the door on time.  It's survival of the fittest and you're at the top of the food chain.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you've accepted that the world will not end if the Barbies end up in the same bin as the Legos.  You have given up the battle to make sure that the Barbies are clean and well-groomed and the floor where your little girl plays often looks like a naked Barbie Woodstock where everyone forgot to brush their hair.....for months.

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you know that scheduling a child constantly is feasible with one...maybe even two.  Once you hit numbers three and four, you make them pick and choose.  You can't be in twelve places at once and your child will not perish if he's not in swimming and soccer and  karate and playgroup and at every week's library story time.

and finally....

BY THE TIME YOU HAVE YOUR FOURTH CHILD, you realize that you're doing a good job even if you have days where you want to pull your hair out.  Scratch that...not "if"..."when".  You hold it together and you kick butt and take names because you are Super Mom....now where the heck is the peanut butter, you have lunches to make

Sisters Shoot....Welcome to the World Baby M





Why Our Generation Needs to Look Back and Learn

"Those that don't learn history are doomed to repeat it."

While I do love to brag on the fact that our generation is not the worst generation on the map, I definitely think our generation has a case of forgetfulness when it comes to generations past.  Maybe it's the idea that they want to parent better than previous generations, as all generations strive to do.  Maybe it's the concept that the world is changing and we need to change with it.  There are a million options but my guess is that most of it is due to too many books, studies, and media outlets  on how you should and shouldn't parent.

Here's where I stand on this:

1.  Studies are a great source of information and knowledge is power but remember that, ultimately, these studies can be very lopsided and short-sighted.  There are a whole host of studies that "find" some terrible truth and then ten years later, the study is discounted.  Instead of just changing your entire outlook on something because of one study, use that study as a jumping off point to learn more, fully educate yourself through multiple sources (including reading those with studies that disagree with the jumping off study) and make an educated decision based on that.  What's best for you or your family might not be best for everyone.

2.  Books, magazine articles and other written information are great sources of information, as well.  In fact, I am a very big advocate for reading as much and about as many different topics as possible.  The more you know, the more you can form truly well-thought-out opinions on important issues in your life.  That's not to say that your opinion may not change with age, new information, or life experience; which brings me to my next point in this.  Do you want to know why our parents did things the way that they did?  I'll give you a hint....it involves accessibility.  There weren't nearly as many books and articles telling us what we should do, what we shouldn't do and how we're "harming our kids."  Ironically, the kids that are being raised now have an entitlement crisis, don't know how to deal with their emotions and are numb to society's most pivotal events because they've been exposed to far too many things too young.  (Yes that is a generalization; not all kids are like this).  There are so many opinions thrown at parents now that we seem to forget how powerful instincts truly are.

3.  The Media...ugh.  I have very mixed feelings on the media.  On the one hand, there's the accessibility of being able to learn new things, have a few minutes of quiet and see how the other half lives.  On the other hand, there's the accessibility that seems to haunt people about how they're living now.  It seems to give a lot of us the idea that our lives are somehow less wonderful because we're not living in a mansion with a pool, walking the red carpet or because we can't afford to buy our newborn $1000 swaddling blankets. The Media has a funny way of convincing us that we have to be like what we're watching; we have to have what we're seeing.  The truth is that the less you expose yourself to that torture, the happier you'll end up being.  Remember, the grass may be greener on the other side, but it still needs to be tended to.

Now, with all of that said, I stand firmly on the fact that our generation needs to look back and learn.  Our parents may not have been perfect but neither are we.  Trying to live your life around every study, book or "parenting method" will make your life miserable.  Use your instincts and just love your kids.  Don't worry if your child is keeping up with other kids...he or she will progress at their pace.  Don't worry if they're too big, small, chubby, thin (unless it's excessive and truly worrisome) or any other quality; your child is exactly the way they're meant to be and they'll change and grow at their pace.  Don't worry if they're not reading before kindergarten, speaking in sentences by age two, or socializing four times a week with their peers.  Believe it or not, they'll turn out fine.  Use your instincts and just love the crap out of them and they'll turn into happy, productive children.