Ten Toddler Rules

Just for fun, today, I'm writing about the top ten things that I think go through the top ten toddler rules.

1.  IT'S MINE.  PERIOD.  If I see it, it's mine.  If I play with it, it's mine.  If I see you playing with it, it's mine.  Mine.

2.  FOOD TASTES BETTER OFF OF YOUR PLATE.  Yes, that's right.  It can be the exact same food that I've just watched you put on both plates.  I will still choose to eat it off of your plate and not my own.

3.  I'M NOT YOUR CIRCUS MONKEY.  I will quote Shakespeare when it's just you and I in the room playing.  The minute you whip out a phone or camera to record it, I'm going to say "Da-da."  If you ask me to repeat it in front of someone else, I'll stare blankly at you.  I don't do the "performing" thing.

4.  THERE IS NO PART OF MY DAY THAT WOULD NOT BE BETTER IF I WAS NAKED.  Seriously, I love being naked.  I have no desire to wear your cute little outfits and shoes.  Once I learn how, I will spend the vast majority of my day undressing myself completely and screeching, running through the house. 

5.  LAUGHING AT ME WHEN I DO SOMETHING NAUGHTY JUST FEEDS MY EGO.  Sure it's cute when I run away when you ask me to get my shoes on.  The fact is that I love it and I love the attention. I will now repeat it every chance I get.

6.  I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT I'M DOING WHEN I THROW A FIT.  My pediatrician keeps trying to tell you that it's me losing control.  In essence, it kind of is.  I want you to do it my way and if you don't, I'm going to let you know....loudly.  You can't reason with me.  You can't ignore me.  I'm going to throw a fit.

7.  I CAN UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU'RE TELLING ME; I'M IGNORING YOU.  That's right, Mom and Dad.  I'm ignoring you.  I can understand your words.  I know exactly what you're telling me to do but....eh....I don't feel like it.  I'll do it my way, thank you.

8.  I AM TOUCHING EVERYTHING BECAUSE THAT'S HOW I LEARN.  I know you get irritated with me for touching everything but this is how I learn.  It's called a sensory experience.  That's why I like to touch the snow that falls off of boots when you walk in.

9.  IF IT'S ON THE FLOOR OR WITHIN MY REACH, IT WILL GO IN MY MOUTH.  Nothing is safe.  Snow from your boots-mouth.  Beads from your bracelet-mouth.  Teeny tiny piece of fuzz undetectable by the adult human eye-mouth.

10.  HUG ME ALL THE TIME BECAUSE I GROW UP QUICKLY.  I may be difficult at times but hug me all the time because, soon enough, I'll be grown and I will roll my eyes at you.  Enjoy every single minute.

Conference Week

After going to conferences last night and hearing three times, "you must be doing something right at home, Mom," I started to think about what I might do differently than some other parents.  I started to think about what I do that some of my kids' friends don't get from their parents and why they claim to love our house.  (I preface by saying that my kids aren't heading off to college tomorrow so I'm not saying I've succeeded yet.  I also want to say that I'm not saying it's the only way; just that this is what works for me.)

I always have snacks on hand.  Every parent seems to say the same thing: you'd swear the kids that visit your house never eat.  My house is no different.  They're always hungry for snacks.

I let them have supervised space.  In other words, I'm checking in on them frequently (age determines how often) but I'm not hovering.  They know I'm there.

I'm not afraid to call it like it is, regardless of who's here.  That means that I'm not afraid to tell you that your backtalk is unacceptable with your friends here.  It keeps the kids in line instead of them thinking they can get away with murder with their friends here.  This, in turn, shows their friends a good example of how to behave.

I'm not afraid to tell a kid that's a guest in my house that their behavior is unacceptable.  I have no shame in saying, "That kind of attitude isn't permitted in my home.  You will speak with respect or you won't speak at all."  This applies to every age group.

I give second chances....and third chances.  I will ban kids from my house but they get a second chance if they show they're trying to fix their behavior.  This makes a HUGE difference.

I'm not afraid of a mess.  Trash your room...as long as you plan to clean it up.

Noise doesn't bother me.  I always said that after three kids, it's just more noise.  It's no extra chaos.  I'm so accustomed to a house full that the noise is soothing to me.

There are expectations but they are goals NOT musts.  If you mess up, you  mess up.  The point is that you need to try.  I have high expectations but they are to encourage, not make unachievable demands.

and finally....

The kids know the rules from the minute they walk in.  My expectation is the same no matter what.  Our house is your home when you visit.  You can get a drink if you're thirsty, grab a snack if you're hungry and speak your mind respectfully.  You're one of us when you visit our home.  I think this makes all the difference.

Off Season Questions

I'm honestly wondering what the heck is going on in the off season with my Broncos.  I'm puzzled as to some of the rumors going around.  I must say that I'm EXTREMELY trusting of John Elway's judgment and, quite frankly, he's proven his ability to make good choices.  So here are some of the things I'm wondering about....

MANNING'S RETURN:  There are rumors swirling everywhere about Manning's return.  I stand by my original statement that we will know nothing until March.  I have mixed feelings.  If it's the Manning of the beginning of last season, I want him to come back.  If it's the Manning of the end of last season, he just needs to retire.  Peyton Manning is, arguably, one of the best players of all time so his legacy will live on regardless.  With that being said, between Elway and Manning, himself, I am very confident that the right decision will be reached.

DEMARYIUS THOMAS:  I understand the concept of restructuring but I'm really hoping Demaryius sticks around.  He has a proven track record.  He's had some slumps, but what athlete hasn't?

JULIUS THOMAS:  This one hurts a little.  I want Julius Thomas back but I'm also a little iffy on the whole budget thing.  Again, I trust Elway but it's gonna hurt to see Julius play elsewhere if he goes.

DEFENSIVE LINE:  We spent a lot of money getting a great defensive line built up.  For that matter, our offense is kicking ass too.  There are a few players I want back, hands down.  Pot Roast is one of them.  I'm going to be one butt-hurt Broncos fan if he leaves us.

I have a few other questions but this is a real wait and see situation.  Let's hope it pans out. 

The 5 Women of Ugggggh Relationships

So since we touched on men last time, let's cover a group of women today that need a boot in the butt.  There are definitely women who pull the same crap as the "trifling men" from last post.  I don't feel the need to rewrite the entire post with feminine pronouns. Instead, I prefer to talk about women on another end of the spectrum.  I want to talk about the soul-crushing women that treat men like crap.  There are a few different varieties that drive me bananas so here goes:

5.  LOW SELF ESTEEM.  Though these are ranked 5, they drive me nearly equally as nuts as every other one.  These are the women that let their low self-esteem turn them into manipulative shrews.  If their man looks at the TV in a sports bar, she assumes he's checking out he younger waitress.  If someone says "hi" on social media, she's convinced he's cheating.  In most cases, it doesn't matter whether the guy tells her 1000 times a day how wonderful she is; she's always going to feel like he's doing something.  Sometimes, these women have been wronged in the past.  Sometimes, she has had low self esteem since childhood.  The ones that drive me the most crazy in this category KNOW that they have this problem and make excuses for why they won't fix it.  They chase men off and then cry over how the men wronged them.

4. MEAN GIRLS.  These are the women that just treat everyone like crap, their man included.  They make everyone feel like shit.  They criticize.  They're assholes.  Period.  They're possessive.  They're the "I need to grab your hand like I own you whenever a girl walks by who glances your way" girls. You know the type.

3.  ATTENTION WHORE.  I'm pretty sure this doesn't even need a full explanation.  This one is actually normally some combination, often a combination with low self esteem.  Some attention whores treat their men like garbage because they want them to tell them how pretty they are.....every second.....of every day.....until the end of time.  Some of them are just attention whores because they can't stand anyone else getting the glory.  No matter what their reasoning, they are always a pain in the butt. 

2.  YOU CAN'T SEE YOUR KIDS.  These women are a special kind of evil and are usually some combinations of some other things too.  They would normally rate #1 but since #1 usually has this trait anyway, they warrant the #2 spot...a very....close.....second.  Anyone who tells their man that they can't see their kids or that their kids can't come over should immediately be kicked to the curb.  I don't care how pretty she is or how sweet she can be or what she can do for you.  I don't care how scared you are of being alone.  If she can't deal with your kids, then she doesn't deserve you....or a spot with any other good man on the planet.  (And yes there is a VAST difference between women that don't want kids and those that say you can't see yours.  Women that don't want kids are just making a life choice.  Women that are controlling enough to say you can't see yours are evil.)

but the winner...the take all is......

1.  COMPLETE CONTROL FREAK.  These are becoming far more common than I'd like.  These women are absolute pains in the asses of everyone around them.   These women like to control every aspect of their man's life from what he wears to who he talks to.  They only let him participate in certain activities and some even cut up their men's food like babies.  These women almost always complain about how their man never does a thing but they are often the culprit of that, letting them do nothing and criticizing what they actually do.  They expect the world from their man but they want to show him absolutely no appreciation to gain that.

I would like to address a little side note here, in closing.  Men, please don't accuse your women of being #1, even in gest, if they aren't.  There is a vast difference between a well-organized woman or an independent woman and a complete control freak.  You know the complete control freak because you've seen them.....they are the ones that you say, "I'd kill her if I was with her." or "She'd drive me nuts." If your woman loves you, supports you, builds you up...she's a keeper, not a control freak.

One final note: Ladies, if you're acting like any of these, wipe that grin off your face.  It's not cute or funny.  It doesn't make you a sexy or independent to act like an asshole.  The fact is that truly great women don't need to treat other people like shit to be sexy.  They're sexy because they are beautiful on the inside too.  They're sexy because they treat everyone with dignity and respect.  They're sexy because they are loving and kind and encouraging.  If you are being any of these five, knock that shit off or you might chase off an amazing man that deserves the best. (Have no fear, amazing man, you'll find your amazing woman too. Not every woman is one of these five).  There's still time to change your behavior ladies.  Don't give away something great for your own pride.

Triflin Men (and NO, it's not all of them)

So I'd like to cover a somewhat sensitive topic.  I want to preface by saying that I am NOT saying that there are not very definite issues on the other side of this (the female side).  I'll cover the issues I have with women on this in another post.  Today, I'm covering the topic of man whores.

First, let me define what I'm talking about when I use the term "man whore."  For me, "man whore" means that a man sleeps around with multiple women in an unprotected environment and continually produces children that he doesn't care for.  Oddly specific, right?  I don't define a man who sleeps around as a man whore if he uses protection; who am I to criticize his habits.  I don't define a man who has multiple children with multiple women as a man whore if he supports them because he's still supporting his children.  I'm talking about the men who hit it and quit it.

Look, I try  not to judge people in this life.  I try to be understanding of their situations.  Everyone makes mistakes, especially in their younger years.  What I can't, for the life of me, understand is men that produce multiple children with multiple women and then walk away from some or all of the kids.  I was always taught that if you're responsible enough to have sex, you're responsible enough to deal with the possible consequences.  Even using birth control AND a condom, there is a minute chance that you can still get pregnant.  If you can't deal with that possibility, you shouldn't be having sex to begin with.  I teach my children the same principle: actions have consequences and unless you're equipped to handle them, you shouldn't do the action to begin with.

I happened to observe a situation yesterday that really got my goat.  A man who has multiple children with three different women was "outing" one of them for publically speaking about his lack of contact with his children.  He doesn't pay child support OR see the children at all.  He made a public spectacle of her, rallied the troops, and condemned her for "making him look like a fool."  I have several problems with this....

First off, a man that doesn't pay for his children is already a fool.  Secondly, a man who feels the need to publically out (and tag) his ex is a fool.  Thirdly, a man who feels the need to rally the troops is already a fool.  In addition, a man who criticizes the woman who pays every red cent of the care for the children you BOTH produced and cares for their every need..that man is a fool. You see, this woman didn't make him look like a fool; he did.  That woman simply called it like she saw it.

I guess the point of all of this is this: There's a bible verse that talks about not criticizing someone for the splinter in their eye when you have a plank in your own eye.  No matter what your religious background (or lack thereof), the principle remains the same.  Don't pick at someone else when you aren't exactly stand up yourself.  Man whores that criticize the exes paying for THEIR babies and taking care of THEIR babies are trifling asshats that need to shut their mouths.

Rant over.

Apologies

I'm sorry that I disappeared for so long.  I ended up with walking pneumonia and pink eye.  It was a nasty, nasty week for me.  I will get back on the posting trail tomorrow :)

I Heart Ebates

So a friend of mine turned me onto a website awhile back and I kind of blew her off initially.  Then I explored it more and more.  It turned out that it was something I absolutely loved...that website is Pinterest.  It is the most fantastic source of craftiness and inspiration I have found online and I love it down to the depths of my being.

More recently, I was referred to another website and I rolled my eyes. Here we go again...another make money from home scheme.  It turns out that it wasn't at all.  It definitely isn't a million dollar scheme but it does exactly what it says it does...it pays you to shop.  So here's the deal on Ebates.......

Completely free to join If I'm being honest, they do send you daily emails but they're not troublesome to me.  In fact, it lets me know if there's a daily deal that would get me even more cash.  They don't make you put in credit card info, etc.  It's kind of awesome.

Wide variety of websites to choose from It's really simple to get on there and search for the websites you use.  I'm infamous for Amazon orders but it also covers everything from books to flowers to toys to Walmart and target and also even does Living Social deals, etc.

Pick your website and go  All you do is choose your website and click "Shop now."  It takes you to your website and you pick out whatever you want and check out as usual.  Super simple.

You get paid So after you place your order, you get paid on your ebates account (which will send you a check to your house).  I'm not gonna lie to you...it's not a get rich scheme.  You may only get a check for $5 or $10 if you're not a big online shopper BUT if you are a big time online shopper like I am, you can make a little bit of cash for online shopping.  If nothing else, it'll pay for the shipping on an item or even get you a bottle of wine.

You get credit for referring friends Again, not hassle free.  You get credit for referring but no punishments or pressure if you don't.

So click this link and sign up....amazing way to get a couple extra bucks for no effort.
Join Ebates

Sick and Sicker

I confess.  I tend to be a bit of an optimist when it comes to illness.  I always think, "Nah....I won't catch that."  I swear by my netti pot (well maintained and cleaned thoroughly) and stick with my natural home remedies as often as possible.  There are two things in the world of everyday illnesses that I'm more likely to get (speaking from experience) and that's pink eye and stomach bugs. I almost never get colds and the like...until this year.

This cold and flu season, I have been a wreck.  Coughs, colds, sore throats, sinus infections....all viral causes.  I'm still just as active and eating relatively healthy, drinking a lot of water.  I haven't changed much but something has changed.  Something in my body chemistry has affected my immunity.  I'm proactively seeking ways to boost it in the coming months so next cold and flu season won't be nearly as bad.

This morning was my peak.  I woke up with a nasty case of pink eye (I'm guessing it's viral) to accompany the nasty cold I've had.  I also have a lovely ratcheting cough that is so severe that I'm throwing up.  I know....you're jealous.  It's okay. I'm not much of a "run to the doctor" kinda gal but this might be the reason to do it. 

So what's the best thing I've heard in all of this craziness....."You should've gotten the flu shot."  I'd like to address that right here and now.  1-Not a SINGLE illness I've had this season has been the respiratory flu (knock  on wood).  It's been a cold or a sinus infection....a virus.  There are plenty of viruses beyond the flu.  2-The flu vaccine only covers a strand or a couple of strands of the flu.  There is widespread news coverage saying that the strand that has been hitting our area in waves isn't even covered by the flu vaccine.  3-The flu shot would not help the pink eye I woke up with.  In fact, if it's viral, NOTHING will cure it.  It's got to run its course.  4-I've done the flu vaccine.  Twice actually.  Both times I had wicked nasty reactions to it.  I've no desire to do it again.

With all of that said, here are my top ten things you shouldn't say to a sicky.....

10.  WELL STAY AWAY FROM ME.  Obviously I'm not planning to come over and lick you.  Come on now.  Be realistic.  Sick people (in general) know that they're contagious.

9.  YOU SHOULD BE AT HOME IN BED.  Well clearly if I had that option I would be.  Sick days aren't a luxury that everyone has. 

8.  YOU SHOULD DRINK SOME ORANGE JUICE OR SOMETHING.  Yes, yes I should.  However, vitamin C doesn't cure your virus.  A virus is a virus.  It can definitely help boost your immune system.

7.  GO LAY DOWN AND REST.  Absolutely, rest is important but I'm a firm believer in moving around some and getting your blood flow going.  Also, for a single mama, "rest" is relative. 

6.  YOU BETTER GO TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM/URGENT CARE.  Really?  Unless my symptoms are so severe that I can't handle them at home, I'm not going to the emergency room.  Why?  Emergency rooms are for....wait for it.....emergency patients.  The doctors? Probably.  The ER...keep dreaming.

5.  IF YOU GET ME SICK, SO HELP ME GOD.... Look, I'm feeling rotten enough.  Again, I'm not planning on licking you. 

4.  WHY ARE YOU COUGHING INTO YOUR ELBOW?  THAT DOESN'T WORK  Actually, it's the recommended way to cover your mouth currently.  Look at it this way: at least I'm covering my mouth when I cough in some way, shape or form.

3.  YOU SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN THE FLU SHOT.  Guess what? It's not always the flu.  Like I said above, even if I DID get the flu shot, there's not a guarantee that the flu strand I get would be covered by the shot.

2.  YOU BETTER GO GET AN ANTIBIOTIC FOR THAT.  This is another pet peeve of mine.  Just so we're clear, antibiotics do NOT help viruses.  A virus is a virus.  It has to run its course.  Antibiotics can sometimes help some of the side effects of a virus (ear infections, etc) BUT overuse of antibiotics can cause you to become resistant.

1.  YOU LOOK LIKE HELL.  This is my absolute favorite.  Of COURSE I look like hell.  I feel like hell too....just so we're clear.

One of THOSE rich people

As I was talking to someone last night, I confirmed what I've said for years.  If I won the lottery or came into money in some other way, I would not be the "stereotypical" wealthy person.  I think there is a generalized idea of what wealthy people look like in this country and I would not be able to fulfill some of that.  Essentially I'd be the Molly Brown on the Titanic. Here are some examples....

*I wouldn't want a big house.  I could be a billionaire and I wouldn't want a big house.  The more house you have, the more house you have to clean.  A reasonably sized house with a bedroom for each child, an office/craft room for me and a garage or two with a nice big yard would be ideal. The Playboy mansion is not necessary for this girl.

*I wouldn't want a super fancy or fast car.  Here's the reality: I have kids.  Kids get things messy.  A super fancy car would get destroyed.  Here is another reality: I hate going super fast in cars.  It scares me. (I love roller coasters but hate going fast in cars...go figure).  If I DID buy a Camaro or corvette, I'd be pissing off the car world because I wouldn't drive it at ridiculous speeds.

*I wouldn't hire a cleaning lady.  If I can't clean my own house, I don't need a house.  Maintenance is part of ownership.

*I wouldn't buy my kids anything they want.  The reality is that my job is to raise them to be productive members of society and handing them everything on a silver platter is not the solution.

*I wouldn't have my kids ridiculously overscheduled.  Most wealthy people I know have their kids in activities every single day from the time they're old enough to walk.  I believe in letting kids be kids.

and finally....

*I wouldn't hoard it.  I'd help friends and family.  I'd give charitably.

Manic Monday

It was a great, but very busy weekend with my crazies and I'm thankful I had some time to relax with them.  We took a trek to the Denver Museum of Nature and Science on Saturday for the Girls & Science event.  Not only did we thoroughly enjoy the museum but the crazies always LOVE getting to go into Denver.  It's quite an adventure.  It's always interesting to see the different things that they're interested in at museums and such.  They have such different personalities and get excited over so many different things.

After the museum, I ran some errands and then went to have dinner and watch some hockey at Twin Peaks.  Did I really go to a sports bar that's KNOWN for being, essentially, The Tilted Kilt on crack?  Yes, yes I did.  Haha.  The chicken strips were amazing when dipped in the ghost pepper wing sauce I got with them.  Good food...good beer.  Awesome.

Yesterday was an all-errand day.  I re-stocked the kitchen as well as the pantry with some paper products and such.  It was a necessary but exhausting day.  Best part of the shopping trek?  A new (but very necessary) vacuum.

Now, back to the grind.  I'm very blessed with an incredible family.

Samsung Galaxy Note 4 Review

In purchasing a new phone, I did extensive reviews.  I really wanted this phone to last for a LONG time.  I decided on the Note 4 and it definitely hasn't let me down.  Here are my favorites about the phone (and the accessories I chose).....

*Battery Life is OUTSTANDING

*Nice big screen

*Stylus has been very helpful already.

*Apps are easy to navigate and use

*Apps available just for this phone are fantastic.

*Fingerprint recognition?  Awesome

*Processes quickly.

*The case that I picked (the flip cover case) is amazing already.  I'm incredibly impressed with its durability and style but also with its compatability with the phone.

*InvisiShield....always an incredible idea.

I recommend this phone to anyone that wants a fabulous phablet.

Denver Museum of Nature and Science Review

My crazies and I attended the "Girls & Science" Event at the Denver Museum of Nature and Science this weekend and I have only good things to say, quite frankly.  Being our first endeavor to the museum, we were also experiencing that for the first time and I have nothing but good things to say about that, as well.

From the minute we arrived, we knew it would be busy.  The parking lots were nearly full only 50 minutes after the museum opened and we ended up parking on a side street.  With that said, the location is fantastic.  It's easy to find, ample parking for normal occasions and EVEN IF YOU HAVE TO PARK ON A SIDE STREET, there are plenty of cross walks and plenty of street parking if it comes down to it.  In addition, the location is close to the zoo (if you're feeling really froggy and want to head out that way before/after) AND City Park (for a picnic lunch, perhaps).

The admission staff was very polite and helpful.  In fact, every staff member we encountered was helpful and wonderful.  In addition, the individuals staffing the booths were fantastic, as well.  The museum was very clean and laid out well.  With the exception of a few of the machines in the health exhibit, everything was functioning beautifully (and with so many people, there were some hiccups to be expected).  It was easy to navigate (even with the crowds) and there was a wide variety of fun things in each exhibit.

My boys loved the space exhibit.  Being able to "dock a spaceship" as well as finding your house on the big "google maps" style table was a blast.  They got to view different kinds of space rocks under microscopes, learn about space and look at a full size model of an exploration station on mars.  The girls were a bit split.  My oldest LOVED the Egypt exhibit.  Getting to see mummies and such was a thrill for her.  My youngest was tied between the Whale exhibit (getting to "dive" with the whale to catch a giant squid was her favorite) and the Prehistoric exhibit with all of the dinosaurs and mammoths.  Everything was very interesting though

In terms of the Girls & Science booths, they were all very cool.  The kids had a chance to be a meteorologist in front of a green screen, dress up in geology gear and learn about geologists, and many more cool opportunities.  They got neat buttons (one of them says O Mg <Oxygen Magnesium>) to show they'd been at the booths and they learned a lot.

Overall, the experience was amazing and I'd return to this museum anytime.

Redwings Rock!

It's Friday and THE REDWINGS WON! My morning is starting off AWESOME! It seems like we split the difference annually on the Redwings vs Avs game but thankfully my bragging rights are back in play (if only for a little while).

I'm asked, quite often, how I'm from Chicago and not a Blackhawks fan. The truth is that I just never clicked with them. The truth is that the Redwings have been my team since I started watching hockey. My parents were never big sports fans with the exception of NASCAR. I grew up on NASCAR and can spout off facts and rules for it like I actually care about it. Its nothing personal... Just not my personal favorite.

My first love is hockey. No question. I love it like I love Mellow Mushroom pizza.... It's the best! My EXTREMELY close second favorite is football. Here's the catch....I'm not much into college sports. When I lived in Michigan, no one could understand why I wasn't in the U of M/Michigan State battle. It's because I'm not all that interested. All I know is the Notre Same game ruined my birthday weekend pretty much every year because U of M lost. Hahaha

So HAPPY FRIDAY..... REDWINGS ROCK!

TBT...Best Friends

TBT....my monkey and her best friend.  I honestly hope these guys stay friends forever because they are like sisters and it's adorable!

It definitely makes me appreciate my friends when I see my girls (well, my KIDS, but especially my girls because girls are more emotional and touchy feely most of the time) hanging out with their friends.  It brings me back to my childhood. :)

A Year Out of My Learning Process

One year ago today, I had complete and total chaos and was struggling with extreme anxiety.  One year ago today, I was dealing with overwhelming thoughts and fear.  One year ago today, my worst nightmare came true.  It was one year ago today......

Now let's talk about where I am today.

Today, I've learned to deal with my anxiety.  I've learned coping skills.  Admittedly, I didn't learn all of them on my own.  I had the help of a very skilled counselor who was intelligent enough to realize that I wasn't depressed...I was anxious.  I was overwhelmed and mostly needed to talk things out.  I needed to learn how to stop taking everyone else's problems on myself.  I needed to learn how to stop stressing myself over things that I couldn't control.  I needed to learn a healthy way to cope.  I learned how to process things. 

Today, I've learned that I can't focus my attention on things and people that don't make me a priority.  It doesn't mean I have to cut them off completely.  It just means I need to stop letting it control my mind.

Today, I've learned that I can't let myself worry constantly.  Worrying is like a rocking chair; I can rock all day long and I'll never go anywhere.  I need to focus my attention on things I can control and realize that I need to live my life one day at a time.

Today, I've learned that I need to express my emotions in a healthy way.  Instead of bottling it all up until I burst, I need to get the emotions out.  Sometimes, that may mean a letter that I never send.  Sometimes that may mean a conversation once I've calmed down.  Sometimes that may mean that I run and just process the feelings on my own.  Sometimes it's just talking to a friend.

Today, I've learned that I need to make time for myself.  It's not always the need for a whole day.  Most of the time, I just need five minutes or fifteen.  The fact is that I have to make my emotional well-being a priority.

Today, I've learned that my support system is the most incredible set of people on the planet.  I've learned that my closest friends and my close family members will be there for me no matter what.  I've learned there are some people who are meant to be in my support system and some that aren't and that I can't force it because of biology.  I have to appreciate the ones that are there and realize that some just aren't meant to be there.

Today, I've learned to be myself freely.  I've learned that it's okay to speak my mind without fear of upsetting someone.  I've learned that I can't control anyone else's reactions but my own.

If you or anyone you know is struggling, take the time for a hug.  Sometimes that physical connection means everything to a person who needs it the most.  I'm thankful daily for the people that did it for me.

Actions and Consequences

At what point, in our country, did we stop expecting that there would be consequences to our actions?  I'd love to know what year and what events had a whole generation of people just decide that they should be able to do whatever they want and everyone should just accept it.  I'm definitely a firm believer in freedom and choices.  With that being said, every action has an equal and opposite reaction.  Here are my feelings on the topic.....

Everyone should have choices and the freedom to make their choices  From the richest to the poorest people in our country, everyone has a choice.  Of course the choices are vastly different but there are choices available to everyone.  The great thing about our country is the freedom to make those choices.  You can choose what kind of car you want to buy or house you want to live in and then work towards those goals.  You can choose whether or not to send your kids to traditional school, Montessori, homeschool, unschool....a lot of options.  You can choose what you want to study and whether you want to go to a university, a trade school, school online....again, a lot of options.  I think that a lot of people don't necessarily appreciate the freedom they have in this country.

The choices you make HAVE consequences  Some of these consequences are short term and some are more far-reaching but there ARE consequences to your choices/actions.  It's the reality of life.  Some of the consequences are great and some are horrible.  The fact is that they DO exist.

No one is exempt.  The great debate right now is the vaccination debate; therefore, I'll use that as an example.  If you choose to vaccinate, there are consequences.  Short term, you have a pinch in your arm (or leg).  Short term, you may spike a fever.  Longer term, you may have a reaction to the vaccine.  Even LONGER term, you have immunity to the disease you were vaccinated against.  Some of the consequences are good, some are bad but they all exist. 
If you choose NOT to vaccinate, there are consequences.  Short term, you will have people question you constantly on your choice.  Longer term, you may have to explain yourself to schools and be denied access to some doctors that don't want to put their patients at risk.  Even longer term, you may well contract the illness.  Longer than that, you may potentially pass this disease onto a lot of people, including immune-deficient people that CAN'T get vaccinated; your choice may kill them.  Again, some of the consequences aren't that bad...and some are devastating and far-reaching.  The fact is that no one is exempt from consequences.

You don't get to tell other people what they NEED to decide  Returning to the vaccine debate, I chose to vaccinate.  It is not my right to tell someone else that they have to vaccinate.  It IS my choice, however, to say that my (hypothetical) newborn is not allowed to have interaction with your unvaccinated child.  You can quote a million statistics on either decide of the debate and that's fine.  Debate is good.  In fact, it's healthy.  With that being said, there is a vast difference between debate and downright rudeness.

and finally.....

Government involvement and demands are NOT the answer  I'm sorry but I firmly believe that MORE government involvement is not the answer.  It's one thing for the government to step up and offer an option to help someone.  It is a starkly different thing for the government to mandate people to do something they should have the freedom to decide.  Freedom is what makes our country great....letting the government take all of that freedom away is giving away the choices you now have.

Post Superbowl Thoughts and Rants

HOLY HELL!  SHUT UP ABOUT THE CHEATER THING!  I think Deflate-Gate was 90% media hype, honestly.  The Patriots would have won that game anyway.  The Patriots deserved to be in the Superbowl.  You can't blame the players for something they had nothing to do with.

KATY PERRY KEPT IT CLASSY Katy pulled off an incredible halftime show with Lenny Kravitz (my favorite part, personally) and Missy Elliot.  The whole thing was awesome and she didn't have to dress like a hooker and twerk to pull it off.  She showcased her talent.  Best halftime show I've seen in awhile.

MARSHAWN LYNCH DIDN'T GET FINED He was just here so he didn't get fined.....

GRONK IS A BALLER Rob Gronkowski is a baller...and he proved it.

IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN 15 YARDS.  The penalty for barreling into the Patriots kicker in the first quarter should have been a 15 yard penalty.  He hit the non-kicking leg....the Seahawks got away with something there.

KEARSE MADE AN AMAZING CATCH  Okay so it wasn't based on skill but it was a great catch.

THE NATIONWIDE COMMERCIAL TO "RAISE AWARENESS"  You didn't raise awareness.  You bummed out a bunch of people watching the Superbowl.  People are now boycotting your business.  You should have stuck with Peyton Manning.

THE COMMERCIALS, OVERALL  The commercials, overall, were way too serious.  I get that some of them were inspirational and I dig that.  With that being said, the whole serious thing doesn't work for me during the Superbowl.  It's supposed to be fun.

BUTLER KILLED IT  Butler made an amazing interception.  Holy hell.

THE SEAHAWKS ARE A BUNCH OF DAMN BABIES  Starting a fight because YOU screwed up....you're an asshat.  Period.  I've said it for a long time. 

Top Five (for me) of This Year's Superbowl

5.  Jermaine Kearse's 4th quarter CRAZY AWESOME catch.  I loathe the Seahawks....I mean I LOATHE the Seahawks.  Granted, it was a fluke of slut magic that the ball bounced exactly right but this catch was incredible.  Period.

4.  The Budweiser Commercial AND the Always Commercial  The commercials were FAR too serious this year.  Holy hell were they serious.  These two were more serious but they were inspirational and awesome.  I liked them.

3.  The Fiat Commercial  Hilarious....that is all

2.  Katy Perry's halftime show  I loved it.  Lenny Kravitz...Missy Eliot.....the whole thing was incredible.  Katy did it classy and it was awesome.

and....

1.  Butler's incredible catch Butler's interception that sealed the deal.....AMAZING!