Monday, February 23, 2015

The 5 Women of Ugggggh Relationships

So since we touched on men last time, let's cover a group of women today that need a boot in the butt.  There are definitely women who pull the same crap as the "trifling men" from last post.  I don't feel the need to rewrite the entire post with feminine pronouns. Instead, I prefer to talk about women on another end of the spectrum.  I want to talk about the soul-crushing women that treat men like crap.  There are a few different varieties that drive me bananas so here goes:

5.  LOW SELF ESTEEM.  Though these are ranked 5, they drive me nearly equally as nuts as every other one.  These are the women that let their low self-esteem turn them into manipulative shrews.  If their man looks at the TV in a sports bar, she assumes he's checking out he younger waitress.  If someone says "hi" on social media, she's convinced he's cheating.  In most cases, it doesn't matter whether the guy tells her 1000 times a day how wonderful she is; she's always going to feel like he's doing something.  Sometimes, these women have been wronged in the past.  Sometimes, she has had low self esteem since childhood.  The ones that drive me the most crazy in this category KNOW that they have this problem and make excuses for why they won't fix it.  They chase men off and then cry over how the men wronged them.

4. MEAN GIRLS.  These are the women that just treat everyone like crap, their man included.  They make everyone feel like shit.  They criticize.  They're assholes.  Period.  They're possessive.  They're the "I need to grab your hand like I own you whenever a girl walks by who glances your way" girls. You know the type.

3.  ATTENTION WHORE.  I'm pretty sure this doesn't even need a full explanation.  This one is actually normally some combination, often a combination with low self esteem.  Some attention whores treat their men like garbage because they want them to tell them how pretty they are.....every second.....of every day.....until the end of time.  Some of them are just attention whores because they can't stand anyone else getting the glory.  No matter what their reasoning, they are always a pain in the butt. 

2.  YOU CAN'T SEE YOUR KIDS.  These women are a special kind of evil and are usually some combinations of some other things too.  They would normally rate #1 but since #1 usually has this trait anyway, they warrant the #2 spot...a very....close.....second.  Anyone who tells their man that they can't see their kids or that their kids can't come over should immediately be kicked to the curb.  I don't care how pretty she is or how sweet she can be or what she can do for you.  I don't care how scared you are of being alone.  If she can't deal with your kids, then she doesn't deserve you....or a spot with any other good man on the planet.  (And yes there is a VAST difference between women that don't want kids and those that say you can't see yours.  Women that don't want kids are just making a life choice.  Women that are controlling enough to say you can't see yours are evil.)

but the winner...the take all is......

1.  COMPLETE CONTROL FREAK.  These are becoming far more common than I'd like.  These women are absolute pains in the asses of everyone around them.   These women like to control every aspect of their man's life from what he wears to who he talks to.  They only let him participate in certain activities and some even cut up their men's food like babies.  These women almost always complain about how their man never does a thing but they are often the culprit of that, letting them do nothing and criticizing what they actually do.  They expect the world from their man but they want to show him absolutely no appreciation to gain that.

I would like to address a little side note here, in closing.  Men, please don't accuse your women of being #1, even in gest, if they aren't.  There is a vast difference between a well-organized woman or an independent woman and a complete control freak.  You know the complete control freak because you've seen them.....they are the ones that you say, "I'd kill her if I was with her." or "She'd drive me nuts." If your woman loves you, supports you, builds you up...she's a keeper, not a control freak.

One final note: Ladies, if you're acting like any of these, wipe that grin off your face.  It's not cute or funny.  It doesn't make you a sexy or independent to act like an asshole.  The fact is that truly great women don't need to treat other people like shit to be sexy.  They're sexy because they are beautiful on the inside too.  They're sexy because they treat everyone with dignity and respect.  They're sexy because they are loving and kind and encouraging.  If you are being any of these five, knock that shit off or you might chase off an amazing man that deserves the best. (Have no fear, amazing man, you'll find your amazing woman too. Not every woman is one of these five).  There's still time to change your behavior ladies.  Don't give away something great for your own pride.

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