Occasionally, just occasionally, it's important to make your kids do something that makes a teenager's eyes roll into the back of their head. What, you ask? Family time....
I strive to eat dinner with my kids every night if I can. Why? Because I believe it's an important time to reconnect as a "team". We may talk about important topics or we may talk about the silliest things you can think of but we consistently connect with each other and touch base on what's going on in each other's lives.
Occasionally we try to do family game nights too. Sometimes it's a Wii game or an X box game. Sometimes it's a game we make up. Sometimes it's something like Guesstures. Inevitably, the eye rolls begin with the teenagers. "Do we REALLY have to do this?" Yes, yes we do. Inevitably they fight it and inevitably, they still have a blast, in the end. The important part is not whether or not they roll their eyes or sigh loudly. The important part is that they are having fun as a family.
Look, life is busy and we don't always have time to achieve the things that we want. We have to savor every moment with our kids because it flies by so quickly. Take the time to do something special with your family, even if it invokes eye rolls, sighs and crossed arms because it can and will be a memory they'll always have.
Wednesday, June 8, 2016
Monday, June 6, 2016
Overstimulation = Naughty Behavior
I want to take a moment to break down something for the parents that seem a bit confused as we're starting summer break. The whole "keep your kids busy because it keeps them out of trouble" thing is designed for older children. It is not designed for 4, 5, 6 year olds that still need down time on a daily basis. Note that I did not say "nap time" there. They don't necessarily need a nap (though they might benefit from it). They need down time. They need time to relax their little brains and calm their little bodies. Despite their high energy attitudes, they are not invincible.
I keep hearing of parents that have their kids in camps or activities every single day of summer break to "keep them busy to stay out of trouble." Well, mom, your 4 year old will do just fine staying out of trouble if you let them....wait for it.....just be a kid. I'm all for activities and giving them something new to do. I love letting them try new things and gain new experiences. However, there's something to be said for letting your kids just go explore the backyard and find roly polies. There's something to be said for taking a walk and playing "I Spy." There's something to be said for making homemade popsicles or playing Simon Says in the sprinkler. It doesn't have to be a $500 camp to be enriching to their minds.
There's also not a need to run them every single day. Providing a child constant entertainment is a dangerous habit to start. THAT is EXACTLY how kids get into trouble. They're so used to being entertained 24/7 that they don't know how to entertain themselves and start looking for adventure. Guess what....it's rarely good adventure. Over-stimulation is a very real cause of misbehavior in children of all ages. Not letting them relax and defrag their brains is a great way to trigger argumentative behavior, attitude and more. Sound like a fun way to spend your summer? Didn't think so.
The point is that before all of this "we need to keep them busy" nonsense, there was a real movement to allow real life experiences to busy them. They viewed outings as special treats and found great ways to entertain themselves from making forts to making up cool new games. They spent their summers being free and just playing....and that's more important than people realize. Before Barbie's dreamhouse made the noises, we were making creative noises ourselves. Before Lego kits came with instructions, we were creating our own castles, robots and forts. We didn't need someone to tell us how to do it....we used our imaginations. There's something to be said for the creativity that brought us great minds like Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg, and other brilliant people that have made millions of dollars from an idea.
You definitely can choose to roll your eyes at me. In fact, it wouldn't be the first time (I have teenagers at home). What you should do, though, is really look at your child and think about what they would love to do with their time if they had the freedom to do it. Allow them to just be kids and develop that awesome unique part of them that they'll use their whole life.
Happy Summer, folks.
I keep hearing of parents that have their kids in camps or activities every single day of summer break to "keep them busy to stay out of trouble." Well, mom, your 4 year old will do just fine staying out of trouble if you let them....wait for it.....just be a kid. I'm all for activities and giving them something new to do. I love letting them try new things and gain new experiences. However, there's something to be said for letting your kids just go explore the backyard and find roly polies. There's something to be said for taking a walk and playing "I Spy." There's something to be said for making homemade popsicles or playing Simon Says in the sprinkler. It doesn't have to be a $500 camp to be enriching to their minds.
There's also not a need to run them every single day. Providing a child constant entertainment is a dangerous habit to start. THAT is EXACTLY how kids get into trouble. They're so used to being entertained 24/7 that they don't know how to entertain themselves and start looking for adventure. Guess what....it's rarely good adventure. Over-stimulation is a very real cause of misbehavior in children of all ages. Not letting them relax and defrag their brains is a great way to trigger argumentative behavior, attitude and more. Sound like a fun way to spend your summer? Didn't think so.
The point is that before all of this "we need to keep them busy" nonsense, there was a real movement to allow real life experiences to busy them. They viewed outings as special treats and found great ways to entertain themselves from making forts to making up cool new games. They spent their summers being free and just playing....and that's more important than people realize. Before Barbie's dreamhouse made the noises, we were making creative noises ourselves. Before Lego kits came with instructions, we were creating our own castles, robots and forts. We didn't need someone to tell us how to do it....we used our imaginations. There's something to be said for the creativity that brought us great minds like Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg, and other brilliant people that have made millions of dollars from an idea.
You definitely can choose to roll your eyes at me. In fact, it wouldn't be the first time (I have teenagers at home). What you should do, though, is really look at your child and think about what they would love to do with their time if they had the freedom to do it. Allow them to just be kids and develop that awesome unique part of them that they'll use their whole life.
Happy Summer, folks.
Sunday, June 5, 2016
Destination Dance LLC-Wheat Ridge, CO
I'm a big promoter of reviewing the businesses you love so I'd like to take a moment to review one I'm personally a HUGE fan of.....
Destination Dance LLC in Wheat Ridge, Colorado!
The staff at Destination Dance is dedicated to making certain that they give your kids a fun experience and that they learn while they're at it. The kids enjoy going to the classes and have the opportunity to perform in various recitals, shows, and so on and so forth. They keep their costs to an affordable rate and their recital and costume fees are also reasonable.
If you haven't got a dance studio, I encourage you to try them out!
Destination Dance LLC in Wheat Ridge, Colorado!
The staff at Destination Dance is dedicated to making certain that they give your kids a fun experience and that they learn while they're at it. The kids enjoy going to the classes and have the opportunity to perform in various recitals, shows, and so on and so forth. They keep their costs to an affordable rate and their recital and costume fees are also reasonable.
If you haven't got a dance studio, I encourage you to try them out!
Sometimes There's a Reason for Jealousy
So I had a newlywed ask me for advice on how to "fix" his wife. Why? Well, she was "getting possessive and jealous over stories about his exes." For how much men love to think women are complicated, some things are pretty simple and it seems like common sense to most of us. This particular situation seems to pop up a lot so let me lay down some ground rules, fellas....
1. If you don't want her bringing up her exes, then DON'T bring them up yourself. When you go to a restaurant, DON'T say, "Well I used to bring Susie Q here." Just don't. Seriously. She will forever associate that place with your ex after that.
2. Please, please, please don't talk about your past sexual endeavors with other women. I don't care how "okay" she says she is with it. She's not okay with hearing the details. All she wants to know is whether or not your clean and MAYBE how many partners (though that can be a dangerous question).
3. Don't compare. Even when you're angry.
and finally
4. If she starts in unprovoked, be clear that she is the ONLY woman for you now and that the other girlfriends you've had don't matter anymore. Then leave it at that. Don't dig yourself a hole for something you don't need to.
Yes, some women are jealous naturally. Some are NOT and are drawn into it by your behavior. Realistically, though, if you're bringing up your exes and talking about all the crazy, kinky stuff you used to do with them, it's YOU that has a problem.
PS Women this applies to you too. Don't do this crap to your man and then get mad that he's jealous and angry. You are just as guilty if you're doing so.
1. If you don't want her bringing up her exes, then DON'T bring them up yourself. When you go to a restaurant, DON'T say, "Well I used to bring Susie Q here." Just don't. Seriously. She will forever associate that place with your ex after that.
2. Please, please, please don't talk about your past sexual endeavors with other women. I don't care how "okay" she says she is with it. She's not okay with hearing the details. All she wants to know is whether or not your clean and MAYBE how many partners (though that can be a dangerous question).
3. Don't compare. Even when you're angry.
and finally
4. If she starts in unprovoked, be clear that she is the ONLY woman for you now and that the other girlfriends you've had don't matter anymore. Then leave it at that. Don't dig yourself a hole for something you don't need to.
Yes, some women are jealous naturally. Some are NOT and are drawn into it by your behavior. Realistically, though, if you're bringing up your exes and talking about all the crazy, kinky stuff you used to do with them, it's YOU that has a problem.
PS Women this applies to you too. Don't do this crap to your man and then get mad that he's jealous and angry. You are just as guilty if you're doing so.
Friday, June 3, 2016
Zoos
I saw an article this morning on how society is to blame for gorilla mom not watching her kid. Don't worry...this article isn't on her. It's about the idea that zoos don't serve educational purpose. I disagree. Here why....
Trips to the zoo that include learning about the animals, whether self guided or field trip, may not directly influence conservation of an endangered species at that moment but it eventually does, for so many. As kids learn about the habitats of animals, they learn to respect and appreciate the contribution these animals make to our world. Many develop a passion from these field trips that might lead them to be a veterinarian, zoologist, or activist. The passion just isn't nearly as strong watching it on a live cam or reading a book. When a child goes on a field trip to the zoo, a seed is planted to learn, help and contribute in any way they can. Money from zoo sales go toward conservation efforts, continued education and stimulation of these creatures.
The idea that all zoo programs are bad is also misleading. While some animals are born in captivity, others were rescued. Some are being bred in zoos to prevent extinction due to poaching and destruction of their habitat. Like everything else, of course there are cons. However, the idea that some bad aspects should equal no zoos at all is a very abrupt way to view it.
Look...I'm all for avoiding circuses due to cruel practices. I'm not a fan of safari trophy hunts, personally but if we want the next generation to do better, we need to teach better and educating them at zoos can be a great tool.
Trips to the zoo that include learning about the animals, whether self guided or field trip, may not directly influence conservation of an endangered species at that moment but it eventually does, for so many. As kids learn about the habitats of animals, they learn to respect and appreciate the contribution these animals make to our world. Many develop a passion from these field trips that might lead them to be a veterinarian, zoologist, or activist. The passion just isn't nearly as strong watching it on a live cam or reading a book. When a child goes on a field trip to the zoo, a seed is planted to learn, help and contribute in any way they can. Money from zoo sales go toward conservation efforts, continued education and stimulation of these creatures.
The idea that all zoo programs are bad is also misleading. While some animals are born in captivity, others were rescued. Some are being bred in zoos to prevent extinction due to poaching and destruction of their habitat. Like everything else, of course there are cons. However, the idea that some bad aspects should equal no zoos at all is a very abrupt way to view it.
Look...I'm all for avoiding circuses due to cruel practices. I'm not a fan of safari trophy hunts, personally but if we want the next generation to do better, we need to teach better and educating them at zoos can be a great tool.
Thursday, June 2, 2016
Someone Always Has it Worse
I'd just like to take a moment to give a gentle reminder....
Just because "someone always has it worse" does not mean that what you're going through isn't legitimately hard or stressful for you."
I think that, sometimes, people have the best of intentions when it comes to saying the phrase "someone always has it worse" or "it could be worse." The problem is that it unintentionally (or perhaps intentionally) makes your problem seem as if it doesn't matter. It makes you seem like a complaining baby.
Here's the thing...
Yes, someone does have it worse. There are starving children. There are nations living in the midst of bombings and those having to abandon everything to get to safety. There are so many bad situations. It definitely could be worse.
However, life is still a stressful, crazy thing sometimes. Your issues are valid. How you react to them is what makes the difference. Allow yourself to grieve, stress or fuss temporarily but then take action. Work your way to that positive attitude that makes all the difference, smile and keep your chin up.
You've got this
Wednesday, June 1, 2016
Just Not Being An Asshole
This Wednesday's snippet is going to be relatively straight-forward so brace yourself......
There seems to be somewhat of a "continental divide" when it comes to environmental issues. You're either a "tree hugger" or you're a "denier." There are few in between. It seems like the deniers get a bad name simply because they disagree with data. The tree huggers get a bad name because they "bully" others on earth-related issues. Here's the thing...... My thoughts on this have zero to do with science. My thoughts on this have to do with basic human goodness and, more than that, responsibility.
I don't think that picking up your trash is always about saving the earth. Yes it absolutely DOES protect the environment but it's also about just basic human decency. You don't throw your trash on the floor of your house, why would you throw it on the ground outside? The reality of the situation is that sometimes cleaning up after yourself is just cleaning up after yourself. Be responsible for your mess!
I don't think that choosing to renew and recycle things is always about saving the earth. It's about basic human decency. Why must we buy so many new things instead of renewing something that is in perfectly good shape?
I think we should teach our kids to clean up after themselves because they're responsible. I think we should teach kids to pick up dog poop in public places because other people walk there and don't want to have to tiptoe when they play frisbee. I think we should teach our kids to leave wildlife (including bugs) alone because the animals are in THEIR homes and you wouldn't want someone coming into YOUR home and bugging you. It's not always about whether or not you're a "tree hugger" ; sometimes, it's about teaching your kids to just be good people.
There seems to be somewhat of a "continental divide" when it comes to environmental issues. You're either a "tree hugger" or you're a "denier." There are few in between. It seems like the deniers get a bad name simply because they disagree with data. The tree huggers get a bad name because they "bully" others on earth-related issues. Here's the thing...... My thoughts on this have zero to do with science. My thoughts on this have to do with basic human goodness and, more than that, responsibility.
I don't think that picking up your trash is always about saving the earth. Yes it absolutely DOES protect the environment but it's also about just basic human decency. You don't throw your trash on the floor of your house, why would you throw it on the ground outside? The reality of the situation is that sometimes cleaning up after yourself is just cleaning up after yourself. Be responsible for your mess!
I don't think that choosing to renew and recycle things is always about saving the earth. It's about basic human decency. Why must we buy so many new things instead of renewing something that is in perfectly good shape?
I think we should teach our kids to clean up after themselves because they're responsible. I think we should teach kids to pick up dog poop in public places because other people walk there and don't want to have to tiptoe when they play frisbee. I think we should teach our kids to leave wildlife (including bugs) alone because the animals are in THEIR homes and you wouldn't want someone coming into YOUR home and bugging you. It's not always about whether or not you're a "tree hugger" ; sometimes, it's about teaching your kids to just be good people.
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