The beginning of the end of relationships can be a bittersweet time. It can often contain a million emotions. You feel the relief of a weight being lifted from the drama you have dealt with yet a sadness for all of the work and heartache you put into it. You feel the happiness of moving on and yet the sadness and mourning of leaving someone behind. It applies to all kinds of relationships from lovers to families to friends to business partners/bosses. All relationships have an end...and all endings have the possibility of being bittersweet. This is not some sad post for me. I'm not going through a break up or some sadness. This is a post about maturing and getting a more clear understanding of some of the blah parts of life. Here are my thoughts....
Relationships are hard sometimes, no matter what. It doesn't matter if it's a friendship, work relationship, love relationship or family. Relationships are absolutely hard sometimes all around. There are going to be fights, stresses, or misunderstandings in all relationships at times. The key is understanding that they're hard and that life is hard at times.
Relationships require work on both sides. Relationships always require work. It might be as simple as a phone call, letter, email, text or whatever. It might be as big a job as racing to someone's house when they're in a place of need. Some require more work than others but they always require work to maintain them...just like all good things in life.
Relationships have to be reciprocal. There are going to be times when one person needs the attention or help more than the other but relationships have to be reciprocal for them to succeed. That means that you have to put in the time to get the benefits.
Relationships have endings...all of them For some relationships, it's a til death do us part. For some relationships, there comes a point in time that you must draw a line and say, "this is unhealthy for us and it needs to stop." Sometimes it's harder than others to draw that line.
Relationships are highly personal. That seems to be obvious but there are a lot of people that place judgments about other people's relationships. THAT is what I am referring to. No one can tell you when it's best to keep trying and when it's best to just let go except you. You know yourself and the situation better than anyone.
Relationships can help you heal. Sometimes this comes in the form of someone coming into your life that brings you joy (child, lover, friend, etc). Sometimes, though, this comes in the form of letting go of someone in order to help you become healthier....of dealing with the heartache that someone caused you in order to make yourself healthier.
Relationships are not always as simple as "blood is thicker than water." While I love that expression, I also loathe it. Sometimes it's not as simple as that. Sometimes people make choices about their lives and who they want in them and you have to accept it. It's not always fun and it's doesn't always make sense but sometimes parents or siblings decide they don't want to have a relationship with you...and it's not about you. It's about them.
and finally....
Relationships are about creating layers to your personal onion. What I mean by this is that relationships aren't meant to fill a void in you. You have to be a complete person for any relationship to succeed. Relationships are meant to add layers to your life. They're meant to create protection, flavor, and fullness. Your support system (your layers) is a big part of you and you deserve greatness.
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