When Reality Slaps You in the Face

There are moments in life where reality slaps you square in the face.  Sometimes it's a light slap like having to wake up on Monday morning after a great weekend or the last day of vacation when you just don't want to leave.  Other times, these moments are bigger and more pronounced.  The slaps are harder and leave a bigger mark.  It hurts.  There's no other way to put it.  It hurts.  I've found that there are only a few things you can do that will truly help you cope in a healthy way.

CLEAR OUT THE CLUTTER AND REALLY LOOK AT THE ISSUE.  If you're lucky enough to have had an issue with another person, especially one that can clearly verbalize their feelings, you're at an advantage.  If the issue is with something else, it will take a bit more work but can still be accomplished.  Clear the emotional clutter around the issue.  Step away from the things and people that heavily influence your thinking and get a clear and realistic idea about what really happened.  Instead of trying to look at it only through your own eyes, take on eyes of others involved in the situation and try to see it from the outside looking in.  Dissect it, if you will, and figure out what led up to the slap.

RESOLVE.  Once you know what the problem is, you must resolve to prevent it.  There's nearly always something you can do to fix a situation (some exceptions being natural disasters and the like).  You might be able to change your approach to someone or something.  You might be able to change your environment a bit to make it a more approachable environment for something or someone.  Regardless, prevention is just as important if not more so than diagnosis.

PUT MEASURES IN PLACE TO HELP YOU.  Instead of just relying on sheer self-control, put measures into place to help you.  This is where you bring in the support system.  This is where you give yourself some sort of accountability.

MOVE ON.  Yes, reality is that no matter how big of a slap in the face it's been, dwelling on the issues will not help you a single bit.  It's not healthy for you or anyone else.  Resolve to realize that you can't change the past but you can change your approach in the future.

Time does heal all wounds but it doesn't do it on its own.  You have to get up and do something about it.  Time only works with you.