Moving On to Bigger and Better Things

Though the title of this refers to "bigger and better things," I suppose there's no true way to know for sure if what you're venturing into in the next big steps are bigger and better or just different.  Certainly, everything has its pros and cons and, honestly, sometimes (just like with a baby) a change of hands is a good thing.

There have been a lot of big steps and changes in my life over the past six months.  I've had a major surgery (well major to ME anyway), changed jobs, and now I'm changing vehicles and going back to having a car payment.  I have to trust that God's had His hand on all of this and that there is a bright side to all of these.  With that being said, I'm going to give a brief synopsis of the GREAT things about this and focus on the positives of these big changes today....

My surgery.  Honestly, four months after my surgery, I'm feeling pretty awesome.  I've gotten back into a regular workout routine.  It's not as intense as I've done previously but it's easing back into it and I'm feeling awesome with it.  It has made me start to feel like me again.  My health has been a lot better and (cover your ears boy) it IS definitely nice to not have periods anymore.  The hot flashes have subsided, for the most part.  I still get hit occasionally.  My body temperature seems to have gone back to  normal so I'm not hot all of the time.  The night sweats have mostly subsided. My mood swings are few and far between.  Honestly, the surgery did exactly what the doctor intended....it made me stronger and more able to take on the future.

My Job Change I went from being a gymnastics instructor to a nanny.  Let me first say that I definitely miss my little guys with gymnastics instruction.  With that being said, I also thankful.  I've already gotten attached to my little buddies during my time with them.  I already feel like they're family.  I've watched some of the strides they're already making and how much they smile when I get to spend time with them and it's wonderful.  I have an amazing boss and she advocates for me.  The whole family have amazingly big  hearts and I love it!  I don't think I could be more blessed in my job front!

My Car Ahhh my car, my baby.  While I am terribly sad to see it totaled out, let me focus on the positive.  Any legal ties I had to my ex on property are now gone.  I am only tied to him through my children now.  The car also needed some work that I won't have to focus on right away now.  My new vehicle (though having a payment stinks) is a great van and suits our family well.  It's a big blessing.

So on this "Flashback Friday", I want to turn my attention to the positives of the blessings that are coming and hope that there are more amazing blessings in my future that bring me even closer to the goals and prayers that I have.  Thank You Lord for all of the blessings I've been given.

Hang in there: The easiest thing to say and the hardest thing to do

Hang in there.  I'm pretty sure that a lot of people say it frequently when someone they know comes into hardship and they don't know what else to say.  I've said it myself pretty frequently.  In my opinion, it stems from an inability to know what to say and even more inability to help with the situation.  Think about it...if you know a friend that's struggling financially and you don't have any finances to help them, what do you say?  Hang in there, it'll get better.  Why?  Because you can't help them and you have no idea what to tell them.  If you have a friend whose mother recently passed away, what do you say?  Hang in there, time heals all wounds.  Why?  Because you can't do anything that will help the situation or take the hurt away; you have no idea what else to say.

Believe in whatever larger than life being you want (or if you so choose, believe in nothing) but God has a funny way of allowing things to happen that make us feel completely and totally overwhelmed.  You're already dealing with a half dozen issues and He allows another issue to be piled on top.  Note how I phrased that though.  I don't believe that God CAUSES these problems but I believe that He allows them to happen.  Sometimes the reasoning is that He's trying to teach us a lesson.  Sometimes the reasoning is that we're too damn stubborn and want to do it our way so He allows us (remember, He gave us free will).  Sometimes the reasoning is that we're about the receive a great blessing and there has to be some rain before the rainbow.  Sometimes it has nothing to do with us at all, I think, but we're just affected by someone else's lot in life.

Whatever the reasoning or cause, hardships stink and "hang in there" is the easiest thing to say but the hardest thing to do.

Taking a Moment to Evaluate Short Term Goals

In the midst of a million things happening at once, I have to stop and take a moment to collect myself.  My vehicle is in limbo right now.  The solutions are such that none of them are truly profitable for me as far as I can see.  That car is my baby and I'm sad that it's "hurting" right now but I'm not sure what the best option is and I'm waiting for God to move swiftly to show me.

My new job is going beautifully but it is definitely exhausting and the hours are long.  That's  a GOOD thing for me financially.  With that being said, I'm happy to be headed for two days of unadulterated crazies time.  I've missed them a lot and if I ever had my way (truly), I'd be a full time SAH mom with a PT travel photography job. Universe, are you listening?  Still, I am thankful for the wonderful job I've been given and the opportunities it will, no doubt, provide.

There have been a few hiccups in the crazies' school stuff.  Mostly it's just other kids being brats and causing stuff.  Daniel decided to lie about his homework and had to spend a whole day catching up on what he should have done during the week.  Long story short, they're doing great but need to buckle down and start exhibiting the effort that I know they're capable of.

So where do I want to be a month from now....

Ideally, the car situation would be resolved with virtually  no financial money up front for us to pay out.  If that means a new car, the new car payment would be affordable and the new car would be the perfect fit.  It that means keeping my car, ALL of the issues with the car would be resolved.

I'd love to see us completely debt-free.  There are a few things I'd like to eliminate completely or downsize but I'd love to be completely and totally debt-free with some savings begun.

Getting settled into the new schedule.  This would mean a lot of things but mostly it'd mean the whole family getting into a rhythm based around our new schedules through school, work, etc.

Eliminating the people that are causing toxic effects on my life and draw closer to the ones that are helping me to move toward my goals or supporting me in them.  I've started the elimination process but it's lengthy and not so much fun.

Slowing down from Daniel's birthday and easing into Anthony's.  Also prepping for Halloween.  I love the idea of decorating but also making/getting great costumes for the kids and maybe even going out with my love to celebrate!

Finding ways to turn God's blessings into praise.  Ultimately, that's what matters, in the end. :)

New Job

I started my new job yesterday and I'm already loving it.  I get the privilege of caring for two precious little munchkins (12 weeks and 14 weeks respectively) for two great families.  I think it will take a little bit of adjustment on all the people involved but I know it's for the best.  We're starting to work on sleep schedules (and schedules in general).  We're working on coordinating our own schedules and finding out what works best for everyone involved.  Thus far, though, here are my favorite things about being back in the world of nannying....

1.  Getting to be a part of a "family."  I have an amazing family of my own but this gives me the privilege of even more "family." 

2.  Even more smiling faces to see on a daily basis.  My little guys (well, guy and girl) are happy as clams to see me in the mornings and after each and every nap.  It's actually pretty awesome!

3.  Great hours, great pay

4.  Weekends off.

5.  Doing something I'm really GREAT at.

6.  Getting to take walks (work out) on the job and it benefits both the babies AND me!

More to come as I continue my job :)

Flash Flood

So after I posted my last post, I had a scary experience.  I got caught in a flash flood wave.  My car was flooded out on the exterior, choked out and refused to come back to life.  I have no idea what the outcome of this is going to be but it scared the crap out of me.  I'm really having a difficult time grasping the whole thing right now.  I just posted about how that car is my baby and it breaks my heart that it might not be around much longer...we shall see.

Window Shopping

Just for fun...okay more for window shopping, I was perusing engagement rings today and fell in love with one.  I'm contemplating proposing to myself so I can have the ring. LOL 

 

So here's my explanation as to why this is the ring that I'm in love with.....

 

1.  It's a small, relatively simple but beautiful ring.  This is the perfect symbolism of me...small, relatively simple but beautiful (and no, I'm not completely narcissistic)

 

2.  It's inexpensive...we're talking under $100.  This is important to me because I don't like wearing alot of money on me.  It's ridiculous to me to spend thousands of dollars on something that isn't about the money...it's about the gesture and what it symbolizes.

 

3.  It's sterling silver as opposed to gold.  I'm not a gold fan...never have been.  I love the look of silver and I think that it's more suiting to my complexion, honestly.  Gold is too fru fru for me.

 

4.  There are four "loops" to represent my four crazies.  Especially being that I'm not some young, wet-behind-the-ears twenty something anymore, this is highly representative of my beautiful children and something I could wear on my hand that tied us all together as a family without the blah of a Mother's ring (which are beautiful for those that love jewelry but I'm not a huge jewelry person...I want an all-in-one here. LOL)

 

5.  The stone is a white sapphire.  Sapphire is my birth stone so I feel like the white sapphire would represent sort of where I came from and who I am.

 

6.  Finally the stone in the middle is round....and those of us that have seen "I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry" can tell you that a circle represents eternity.  It's never-ending. Haha!  Seriously though, the circle represents forever with the person I love most.

 

So, yes, engagement probably is a long time off (if it happens at all) but this is what I want to represent my beautiful family if it happens....the perfect gesture of love and the perfect ring to go with it.  On that note, maybe I'll propose to myself as a late birthday gift.



Taking Care of What You Have

Taking care of what you have is important.  In fact, I sometimes forget HOW important.  I get so wrapped up in how much things are gonna cost or how much time it'll take in the midst of my busy schedule that I forget that I need to take care of things.  My car is one of those examples.

I love my car.  In fact, I love my car a lot.  No, it's not the coolest car on the planet or the one that goes from 0-60 in under 30 seconds but it's mine and it's paid for and it's wonderful because of that.  My car needs a lot of maintenance right now.  I managed to get my plates for the year as well as getting one part fixed but it still needs a laundry list of other things done.

In seeing the list and spending time today (and I mean ALOT of time) scrubbing my car and taking care of it, I began to really think about how much this car has been through and how many amazing memories it has.  It's made trips from here to there and it even brought me out here.  It's my first new car that I've owned outright and it's seen Syd come home from the hospital, even.

I got a real reminder today of the fact that I need to really prioritize caring for my "baby" and making sure that it's taken care of in the most optimum fashion.  Here's to praying that money happens and I can make the things I want to fix come to fruition. :)