Support

I have heard an incredible amount of people commenting last night and this morning on the Kardashians first hearing about Bruce Jenner's transition to a woman. I should, first, say that my opinion on the topic is as follows: Bruce Jenner is an Olympic athlete who has achieved incredible feats.  It is very sad to me that all the current generation will remember him for is his association with the Kardashians and this moment, a moment that should be have allowed to be private (or as private as Bruce chooses it to be).  On to other aspects of my post, though....

I see people commenting about how they can't believe how selfish they were upon hearing the news.  They can't believe that the girls were all concerned about how Kris would handle it.  All I can say about that is that you don't know how you'd react to something until you've walked a mile in their shoes.  I'm DEFINITELY not condoning the way they reacted or glorifying it.  I'd like to think that my concern would have been for how difficult this must have been for Bruce and how he is handling the stress that comes with letting people in on his secret.  With that being said, I can't judge them for how they've handled it because I don't know what I'd truly say in that moment, before I had a chance to truly think it over.  I'd also say that perhaps history should have told the audience that the family has a history of reacting much the same way they reacted initially in this case too.  I'm not saying it's good or bad....just that it is a relatively normal reaction from what I've seen.

With all of that being said, I'd like to take a moment to address something I feel strongly about in a family (be it blood relatives, marriage, or just a group of people that refer to each other as family).  That topic is SUPPORT.  Look, as a parent, I understand that we don't always like the choices our kids make.  We may not like their choice of clothes or their choice of friends or their choice of major in college.  We may not like their choice to play baseball instead of basketball.  We have these hopes and dreams of what we want our kids to look like and it is sometimes hard to look at those dreams and realize that kids are their own person and have their own abilities, interests, and so on.  I truly believe that our friendships, love relationships and so on have these same expectations.  We set expectations of what we want it to look like and feel slightly disappointed when it doesn't look the same way.  It is perfectly okay to feel that disappointment but how you react to it is a different story.

Whether your relationship is a friendship, family relationship, love relationship or whatever, if you are truly there for someone, it means you support them.  You don't have to like their decision but you support it.  Of course the exception is if the person is hurting themselves or someone else in the process (aka addiction, suicidal thoughts, etc).  The reality is that their life is their life and they have to live with the fallout of whatever choice they make.  They don't need you telling them what to do but just being there for them when they're struggling through this thing called life.  You can give your opinion in a constructive way (or just keep your mouth shut if it applies) but then you need to just leave it be and just BE THERE.  If you don't like who your son is dating, you don't have to like it....just give your opinion and then be there to catch them.   If you don't like your daughter's chosen major, don't like it....but be there and understand that they've made a choice.

My final thought on the matter is this: You may not always understand the choices that someone else makes.  You may think that you'd never be able to do a job that takes so much time away from their family but it works for your friend.  You may think that you wouldn't dare forgive and forget from a friendship where someone was hurt so badly but they are able to do it and live happily.  You may think that someone should just walk away from a relationship but they keep fighting to make it work.  It's not your responsibility to take stock of what everyone's choices are, the mistakes that are made, or the life they've chosen to live.  If you are a friend, family member, etc your responsibility (in my opinion) is to be there to support someone whether you understand it or not.  Save your "I told you so's" until you've walked a day in their shoes.