"A Girl Like Her: The Aftermath"

If you chose to watch the documentary from my last post, "A Girl Like Her", I hope you explored the website and saw the movies in the "aftermath" section.  If you did, you saw both sides of the story.  You got a chance to see what both the (former) bully and the victim felt six months later.  You got to see how they've changed and how their lives have changed.

I have a thought.....

What if we made it a priority, not just as parents, but as a community to make sure that every single child felt worthy?  What if we made it a priority to make sure that every single child felt loved?  What if we made it a priority to make sure that every single child felt like they had someone to truly talk to, no judgments?  What if we made it a priority to encourage positivity in our children and in our community and to make everyone feel welcome?  What if we made sure that everyone in our community felt like they were part of something bigger?

What if....?

I wonder if that would make a difference in the amount of bullying that takes place.  In the aftermath, the (former) bully reflects something that I find to be incredibly important and brave on her part: she says that "it gave her attention" and that "even if it wasn't positive, it was attention."  I feel like this speaks volumes in so many cases.  Think, if you will, about a toddler and what they will do for attention; they don't care if it's negative or not, they just want the attention.  Even we, as adults, do things to get attention and, often, don't care if it's negative or positive attention.  What if these bullies felt like they were wonderful just as they were?  What if these bullies felt like they were wonderful WITHOUT this attention?  What if we taught them to focus on what they are good at and praised them for their own strengths, whatever those may be?

I wonder if it would make a difference in the victims.  I wonder if this outreach would not just help bullies stop but would help the victims to feel stronger.  I wonder if it would help them feel more represented.  I wonder if it would help them feel more real.  I wonder if it would help them feel more empowered...I guess that's what I'd love to see more.  I want them to feel more empowered.  I want them to feel like they are amazing and perfect just the way they are and that they have strengths that are beyond their understand.  What if we praised them for their strengths, whatever those may be?  Would we help them to step out from behind those bullies and be more strong, empowered and safe?
Could we make them feel safer and more supported?

What if we made it a priority to make these kids know how wonderful we are?  What if, if a child's needs weren't being met in their home, we made it a priority to take that extra time?  Cook them a meal and just let them talk.  Be there for your children's friends.  Be there for those around you, even if it means taking a little time away from what you're doing.  What if we could let them know they're all loved and they're all unique and they're all wonderful?