"A Girl Like Her"

I just finished watching a documentary on Netflix called "A Girl Like Her."  This girl is a documentary about a young lady who is being bullied so severely in high school that she attempts to take her life.  As it happens, the bullying is secretly being documented by the young lady's best friend and by a small pin cam that she wears for at least six months.  In the end, the bully is shown the footage and has an epiphany about her behavior.  If I could show this documentary to everyone in the United States, I surely would.  Thank you to the filmmakers for this eye-opening look at what happens in this school.

There is a vast difference between just silly teasing and good-hearted fun and bullying.  So first off, let's not confuse the two.  The first (silly teasing and good-hearted fun) is done with a loving heart.  It's the kind of "teasing" that takes place in families and good friends.  It's done with a soft heart, both knowing that you're just joking.  It's funny to BOTH of you because it's done out of love and peace.

Then there is bullying.....

Bullying is ANY behavior in which you are treating someone negatively to make yourself feel better. It might be as "small" as deeming someone the smelly kid or the unpopular girl and openly teasing them about it.  It might be as "small" as bumping someone intentionally going down the hallway to show your superiority and make the other person feel small.  It might be as "small" as intentionally making someone feel like an outsider just because you can.  It might be as "small" as tagging someone in nasty photos on Facebook just to make them feel bad.  Bullying comes in many, many forms and even the small things hurt more than you can imagine.

For many, though, it's bigger than these "small" things.  For many, it's real every single day and it's relentless.  For many, it isn't "just" bumping in the hallway; it's in school, in texts, on social media, and everywhere else.  It's hateful words.  It's commands for suicide.  It's about a bully making them feel worthless every single moment of every single day.  It's not "just" one experience; it's experiences every single moment of every single day and it's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel for them.

I want to direct something to them right now because I lived through bullying when I was younger (and bullying didn't extend to texts and social media).  You are stronger than you know.  You are smarter than you know.  You are more beautiful than you know.  I know it feels dark and it feels hard but there is a way to thrive.  You can do more than just survive.  You are wonderful and if you ever need a reminder of that, you let me know.

To the administrators in these schools, stand up.  Stand up for these kids.  You see it.  You know it's happening.  I don't care what the policies say....stand up.  Be that person.

If you're someone who's watching the bullying, stand up.  Tell someone.  You're bigger than you think you are.  You're stronger than you know and bullies will seldom continue behavior when there is a group of people standing up for their victim.  If they can't single someone out, they can't bully them.  Be there.  Be the person who stands up and stands firm.  Love your friends.  Just love them.

And if you're a bully, I hope you watch this film and it changes you.  I hope that, like the bully in this film, you have an epiphany.  I hope it reaches to your soul.

Thank you, again, to the filmmakers.  You have created a masterpiece that will reach to the core of the watchers and change lives.