In my opinion, this all started in my parents' generation. The media likes to blame it on my generation but I believe that it stems back to theirs more than anything. You see, in my grandparents' generation, it was a very different time. People may have protested things but they protested things that truly mattered and that affected the people as a whole. Their focus was on the family and they knew that they had to live within their means to provide in the right way for their family. They didn't care if they liked or hated the people at work because they went to work to work, not to make friends. Their kids drove them crazy but they knew that they made the choice to be parents. Yes, there were people that acted promiscuously or were drunks or committed crimes, but there weren't as many because people actually understood that there were real consequences for their crimes.
Then came my parents' generation. Now I can't blame everything on them but I believe this is where the corruption truly hit hard. Protesting was a common part of life in that generation but people started to get selfish in their protests. It wasn't always about the good of mankind....some of it became about the good of "me." We came a long way towards equal rights in this generation which is FANTASTIC but we also came a long way toward the entitlement era that now plagues our nation. This was the generation (in my opinion) that started teaching their kids that they were entitled to special treatment, their feelings couldn't be hurt, and they were special. Now, before I get maimed for saying otherwise, I'm not saying that every person isn't special in their own way. What I AM saying is that this is where entitlement began. It wasn't something that just happened; it was something that was taught actively, though they didn't even know that they were doing it.
My generation grew up in a completely different way because of these lessons. Many of them grew up thinking that things needed to be done to cater to them. "You can be anything you want" taught kids that they didn't necessarily need to worry about what they were good at but that you can be an Olympic gymnast even if you have no coordination, an astronaut even if you couldn't pass elementary school math, and so on. "I want my kids to have it better off than I did" taught kids that they didn't have to work for what they wanted because it was their parents job to give them what they want and then THEY should do the same thing for THEIR kids down the line. Our generation was taught to be critical of everything and everyone because they weren't giving proper respect. Our generation as taught that kids can sass talk their parents and parents should just "deal with it." We were taught to play the blame game because everything is someone else's fault. We were taught that families are disposable and that friends are a dime a dozen. There are a million things that our generation was blamed for that weren't just a behavior we picked up; it was taught to us by well-meaning parents who didn't know what kind of a monster they were creating.
Fast forward to the current generation that is coming of age. The movement seems to be split into two COMPLETELY different sections. There is a population of parents that believe that kids are too entitled and are turning into spoiled brats. This group of parents often still believes in old school parenting methods such as spanking, standing in the corner, soap on the tongue, and so on. This group of parents believes in teaching their kids that talking back is not acceptable and, while they will deal with a certain amount of it, you often find that these kids are more accepting of authority because they understand that adults are the authority. This group tends to place a fair amount of responsibility on their children (chores, etc) because they want to teach their children real-world life skills. These parents may read parenting books and articles but they don't live their life by them; they live their lives by experience. They believe in kicking your kids out the door to play, letting them get dirty, and that there is a time and a place for medicine (and a time and place to let your body handle it). I could go on but you get the idea.
The other population of parents seems to be a generation of "our parents didn't know what they were doing" kids. A good portion of these parents will tell you that they were "abused" as children because they were spanked (a matter of opinion, to say the least). A good portion of these parents will also tell you how they were bullied or how terrible they had it (Not all parents of this population do this but a good portion do, in my opinion). This group of parents tends towards the "I don't want to hurt their feelings" way of parenting. You aren't allowed to raise your voice, spank, put them in the corner, etc because it's "damaging"....research shows it. You aren't allowed to feed them junk food EVER, send them to traditional school, and if you don't breast feed your child until they go to college, you're a bad parent (I'm exaggerating, of course). Now SOME of the kids from this are sweet, respectable (though often VERY naeive) kids and SOME of them turn out to be self-entitled jerks because their parents never tell them no.
So what's the answer? Maybe we should stop looking at what these doctors are claiming is well-founded research and really look at our grandparents' generation. Maybe we should make kids understand that actions have consequences. Maybe we should teach them that the world isn't fair but they always have a soft place to fall at home. Maybe we should teach them the value of a dollar and that time is just as important, if not more so, than stuff. Maybe we should teach them that adults ARE to be respected and that they don't have to "earn" their respect; they are elders and should be treated as such. Maybe we should talk to our grandparents and look a bit more at how they grew up. Instead of focusing on how we "aren't getting our respect", maybe we should think about what respect we're putting out into the world for ourselves, our children and others.
End of rant.
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