Thursday, December 5, 2013

Take a Look at Other Nations

Since I'm back from my little hiatus, I feel like the first thing I want to discuss is family structure.  Our nation is great because there are all types of families here in all shapes and sizes.  We are generally told that our nation embraces that but that's not always the case.  There are a million and one ways to be a family yet we're fighting for the rights of some to marry (or divorce), our divorce rate is outrageous, and things like wife swapping exist.  So what's my little rant about?  Here goes....

I have a tendency to believe that a lot of our nation's residents mock or poo-poo less fortunate nations for what they don't have.  We try to go in and fix them.  To be honest, some things they need....clean water, chance at education, and so on.  There's also a lot we could learn from them, though.  We could learn about family.

It seems that our nation has turned into a bunch of "Me mentality" buttholes.  Oh sure, we all come together when there's a big crisis here or in other parts of the world.  We all hold each others hands and feel good about ourselves for a little while because we sent clothes or money or food.  I'm NOT saying that those things aren't great steps towards being a better person.  They are all.  I think we should aim to give each other a hand up more often.  With that being said, a lot of people "help" all of these nations or crisis victims and forget about their families and being there for them.

In many other nations, it is not unusual for generations to all live in the same house or on the same general property.  The grandparents help raise the kids, the kids learn to help out the grandparents.  It's a smooth running and wonderful family unit.  Do they argue and get irritated with each other?  I'm sure they do.  I don't know that anyone is completely immune from getting irritated with someone they're with non stop.  The thing is...a lot of these families are together even more than we are with a lot less to entertain them (no tvs, etc) and they have more whole, smoother running families than we do.  We keep saying what they DON'T have and how we need to fix them but the fact is that a lot of these people don't want to be corrupted like a lot of our nation's people.

I'm not suggesting that we all completely buck technology and become pseudo-Amish (and I'm NOT knocking Amish people because they have it together in a lot of ways too).  What I am suggesting is that we should, perhaps, take a long hard look at how we treat each other, especially our families.  Instead of viewing our families as disposable, irritating, convenience options, maybe we should truly begin to focus on our families as the amazing blessing that they can be.  Maybe your family is related by blood and maybe you've been brought together by adoption or by chance.  It doesn't matter, they are an important part of your life.  Here are a few things I'd like to finish off with as a means to remember.....

*Your mom/dad may drive you nuts but they're (likely) the only mom/dad you're ever gonna have.  As a parent, I daily look at my life and think, "my parents had the best intentions" and a lot of the time, they were right.  I honestly believe that a lot of parents, I'd venture to say "most" parents, honestly do the best they can with the resources that they have.  Do they make mistakes?  Yes.  I make mistakes as a parent now.  The great news is that parents are intended to unconditionally love their children.

*Your family is NOT an aggravation unless you make them that.  People come in all shapes and sizes and with all types of personalities.  You might not mesh well personality-wise with all of your family but they are still your family. You are not entitled to choose people's personalities and reactions to things.  You are only entitled to choosing your own reactions to them. 

*Your family is not just for your convenience.  There are circumstances that lead families to be severed sometimes but your kids, your parents are not just a convenience.

*If you make a choice to ignore/deny contact with your family, you should be prepared to deal with the consequences down the line.  Those that read regularly know that I'm a believer in karma and I believe that acting that way has consequences down the line.

Maybe if families focused a little MORE on this and a little LESS on who's driving them crazy, not giving them "the respect they deserve" and so on, they'd realize that life is a lot more than just me, me, me. 

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