Saturday, April 12, 2014

Respecting Yourself

I have been on a bit of a bender lately trying to convince my friends (and family) that they are amazing exactly how they are.  It's not some mission to blow smoke up people's ass or to sugar coat something to make them feel good about themselves.  It is a true feeling that I have about the people that I love.  I honestly believe that there is beauty in everyone no matter what size, color or culture.  As always, I have some opinions on the topic that range a bit so bear with me....

Your body is exactly the way it's meant to be.  Yes, that means that you might have a bigger bone structure or you might be built really thin.  You might have really dark skin or really light skin.  You might have curly hair or stick straight hair and it might be thick or thin.  And yes, ladies, you might have a ginormous rack...or you might be small busted like me.  Guess what?  It's exactly what it's supposed to be.  Own it!  I don't mean to be brash so brace yourself is this might offend you but yes, I have smallish boobs....they're not much but they're mine and I'm proud of them exactly the way they are.  I have a head full of crazy curls (and yes I do straighten occasionally) but I own it.  I understand that I may never be on the cover of Maxim but I love myself exactly the way I am.

Health is more important than a number.  Anyone that knows me knows that I am not a fan of doctors for a lot of reasons.  One of these reason is that there is always a chart...a number of what you SHOULD be.  You should be this weight or this BMI or a million other things.  People are all different and I believe that, from birth, numbers are just that..numbers.  If you are healthy, the numbers don't matter.  I can't be a chronic dieter because I enjoy food FAR too much.  I have mild hyperthyroidism so my body naturally operates on a "thin" level (though it comes with side effects) but I'm also hypoglycemic so I have to eat regularly.  I can't imagine starving myself or limiting what I can eat (though I understand portion size).  I don't believe in cutting out all carbs or all meat or anything like that.  I think that you should get yourself or keep yourself healthy and stop worrying about the damn numbers on the scales, the tags, or the doctor's charts.

EVERYONE is beautiful but some people blow it with their mouth.  That sounded almost explicit, didn't it?  There are some people that are incredibly beautiful outwardly but become less so to me because they run their mouths with arrogance, cruelty and so on.  By the same token, there are a lot of people that I think are absolutely gorgeous that the world says are not.  Every single person on this planet has some beauty in them no matter how far hidden it is.  Some people choose to hide it with their actions.  For the most part, though, there are a lot of people underappreciated because they aren't what the world considers "beautiful."  I do consider myself beautiful and I don't think that it's cocky to say so.  With that being said, I don't consider myself extraordinary....extraordinary beauty has yet to meet my eye.  There are some women that are stunning but have bad attitudes and some that are "average" but incredibly beautiful inwardly.  I don't know that extraordinary beauty exists because I think that there is much less appreciation for TRUE beauty than there should be.

Beauty is not about being a skank  Yes there's probably a less crude way to phrase that but, well that's me.  There is a time and a place for dressing sexy but it's not NECESSARY to being beautiful.  There is just as much beauty in a classy suit as there is a sexy piece of lingerie.  It's not about the clothes as much as it is the way you carry yourself.  It's not necessary to put it all out there.  If you feel comfortable that way, it's not being a skank. Dressing sexy doesn't make you a skank.  A skank is someone that is dressing in a certain way for attention of others.  Beauty is not about the amount of attention you get.  It's about feeling comfortable in YOUR skin.

Beauty is about being comfortable in your skin.  This sort of plays on my last comment.  Some people are comfortable in turtlenecks or sweats.  Some are comfortable in jeans, some in dresses.  Hell, I'm comfortable in a comfortable pair of gym shorts, a tank top and some knee socks (yep, guilty...I looooove knee socks)  I'm equally as comfortable in a pair of jeans and high heels (another guilty pleasure).  What your comfortable in may vary from day to day or activity to activity but don't dress to impress someone else, keep up with a trend or be like some celebrity.  Be YOU!  Beauty is about feeling confident and that comes from being comfortable in your skin.

Beauty is not the number of selfies you post  I get the concept of selfies.  I truly do.  It's perfectly fine to take pictures of yourself having a good time.  When it becomes obsessive or inappropriate (after sex selfie trend), there's a problem.  You can post a million selfies and it's not going to make people think you're any more or less beautiful.  It's really easy to take a picture of yourself all decked out and leading the world to believe that you're like that when you wake up.  It's another thing to be real about who you are and not need the affirmation of the world of facebook (or whatever other outlet) saying how pretty you are.

Intelligence is beautiful  My pet peeve is girls dumbing themselves down to appear more attractive to a guy.  Oy!  If a guy is threatened by your intelligence then it's on him..not you.  (and vice versa).  True intelligence is beautiful.  Let me go a step further...KNOWLEDGE is beautiful.  Learning about someone else's culture, religion, and so on and so forth expands your mind.  Truly open minds are beautiful.

and finally.....

Beauty changes with age.  It doesn't get better or worse...it changes.  The definition of beauty is different at every age.  Chubby cheeks are adorable on babies yet wrinkles are considered ugly.  I have seen many absolutely stunning older women that have wrinkles upon wrinkles but they shine because they're happy with themselves.  Beauty changes its definition with age...boobs sag (as do man parts, boys), hair gets gray, and so on.  Cosmetic surgery is a solution for some but the reality is that you're going to change no matter what.  There's nothing wrong with dying your hair or taking care of yourself but understand that your stretch marks make a declaration that you carried a child, you are gaining age but you are gaining beauty in a different way.

If more women in this world (and men for that matter) understood the real meaning of beauty and respecting yourself, maybe there would be less criticism and mean girl syndrome.

No comments:

Post a Comment