1. Let him show his emotions. Boys are an entirely different ball park for most of us moms who are used the chewy emotional goodness of girls. Let him cry when he's sad. Let him get angry. Show him how to channel those emotions in a positive way but allow him to feel them.
2. Let him wrestle. While it is perfectly normal and appropriate to set boundaries (no wrestling in the house, etc), let him wrestle and play rough. It is a normal, healthy way that some boys get their energy out and there are certain rites of passage, that girls will likely never understand, that come from allowing and encouraging them to play rough and tumble
3. Teach him to be a gentleman. Single moms, married moms, dating moms...doesn't matter. Whatever parent or guardian a little boy has should teach him to be a gentleman. Yes, it might be old-fashioned but teach him to open doors for people, stick up for a girl that's being picked on, and call people "ma'am" and "sir".
4. Let him use his imagination. Too often, little imaginations are squelched because playing with a certain toy or in a certain way is too "girly." While I do think our society is feminizing boys, I also think that there are a lot of things that some people consider "girly" that are harmless. Pick your battles and encourage them to use their imagination....make up games, create comic books, and whatever else their little brains can think up.
5. Teach him to NEVER hit a girl. This one is difficult if he has a sister because, let's be honest, siblings fight sometimes. With that being said, let him know that it is NEVER appropriate to hit a girl. Teach him to walk away, even if a girl hits him first.
6. Teach him to throw a ball. No, it's not a profound breakthrough that I'm offering up here but teach him how to throw a ball. Teach him how to shoot basket. Teach him how to catch. Teach him how to climb a tree. Let boys be boys.
7. Let him get dirty....REALLY DIRTY I don't care what the world tells you about hand sanitizer and germs. Let him get dirty. Let him roll in the mud. Let him get grass stains on his knees and scrapes and bruises from running around in the yard.
8. Resist the urge to overuse the phrase "Be Careful" There is a rather vast majority of boys that are little daredevils and they are going to act like tiny, awesome hooligans no matter what. Reserve the use of the words "be careful" for truly dangerous situations.
9. Teach them the appropriate time for "potty humor." Let's be honest: there is no escaping the wonders of how funny boys think potty humor is. Don't discourage them from laughing hysterically at the word "doody." Instead, teach them when the appropriate time is for it.
10. Don't put limitations on their intelligence. Stop listening to the books and studies telling you that girls are better at reading and boys are better at math. Don't let that become your excuse for why he doesn't like to read. Instill the love of reading early on and find what they're interested in. Encourage them to be smart in all things and not to be ashamed of it.
11. Teach them that geeks rule the world. For how much bullying goes on in this world, it IS important for people to take a stand. It is also important, though, for us to teach our sons (and daughters) how to NOT internalize everything people say. Guess what? They're calling you a geek and you might be a geek but geeks rule the world, son. Teach them to own their quirks unashamedly and bullies will have nothing to focus on because the reaction isn't there.
12. Don't be afraid to tell him to "shake it off." While I think that showing emotion is important, there is something to be said for telling your son with a tiny scraped knee to shake it off. He's gonna be fine and he's going to learn an important lesson on getting up and dusting himself off. I'm not suggesting telling him to "man up" when he's broken his arm but telling him to "shake it off" when he's fallen off his bike and skinned his knee is appropriate and fine.
13. Teach him the phrase "Who cares?" and when to use it. This doesn't sound important but the first time someone tells him "If you don't do this (insert in appropriate activity here), you're a baby," you'll realize how important this is. Boys are incredibly susceptible to being called weenie or baby and succumbing to the urge to show their asses to prove they're not. Teach them to just say, "Who cares" and walk away. If the bullies aren't getting a reaction, they won't bother.
14. Show them real heroes. While it's great to teach them about superman and let them think Spiderman is awesome, teach them about real heroes....soldiers, doctors, firemen, policemen and so on. Teach them about the real qualities that men should have.
15. Teach them that girls are not just appearance. I think this is one of the most important things you can instill in a boy. Yes, it is natural for boys to automatically be drawn to appearance and what they find pretty but teach them that girls are not JUST about appearance and that it is far more important to find someone that you can talk to, hang out with, and have fun with. Teach them to be real men.
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