A couple of years ago, I had to see a counselor. Let me rephrase that....I chose to see a counselor and continue to see her until she basically said that I'm using the tools she gave me to use and I could call her as needed. You see, I "suffer" from severe anxiety. I put that word in quotation marks because "suffering" is relative. There are so many more that suffer more than I could imagine. There are ways to treat anxiety if the patients are willing to use them, be that medication for some or coping tools for others (and, I'm sure even more treatments are available). So you see, "suffer" is a word I don't like to use lightly. It is not who I am and the coping techniques taught to me, along with the ability to see a panic attack coming on have cut back my anxiety by about 95%. I still feel concerned about things but I use the techniques to assess the situation and work through it. It comes naturally, at this point, because it's habit. I'm thankful to that counselor every single day for teaching me all of these things and for seeing that, for me, it was simple.
I say all of that to say a few things....
1-One of the biggest things I learned in reducing my anxiety was to remove people and situations from my life that make me anxious. In most cases, this has become relatively simple for me. In a few rare instances, though, I didn't even realize how much a person or a situation was stressing me until it resolves itself. Then, when the person or situation disappears, I feel a huge sense of relief.... it makes me realize that I didn't even see how much anxiety it was causing me. Your mental health and stressors are always a work in progress. Know that life is an ever-changing, awesome experience and that using the tools provided by a professional can absolutely help you to get to a point where something that would have stressed you over the top years ago settles in and lets you move on after working at it.
2-You should NEVER be afraid to get help. Maybe that's a psychiatrist that can prescribe you medicine. Maybe it's a psychologist or counselor. Whatever the case may be, you should never ever be afraid to just get the help you need. "But I feel worse when I see a counselor...I feel worse after." Then you're not seeing the right person for your needs. Don't be afraid to step up and get the helpp you need for whatever ails you. It's nothing to be ashamed of and it's nothing to feel self-conscious about.
3- Anxiety, depression and the like are very real conditions. While I don't suffer from depression personally, I have seen it darken some of my nearest and dearest. While some have gotten help, others continue to live in the darkness, blaming others for their sadness. I've lived through thinking that my anxiety is caused by others. The reality is that you have the tools within you to control your own mental health. No one else is the cause of your depression or anxiety. No one situation can control your depression or anxiety. It has to come from within you. It is a very real and very scary thing to live through and there are many that have suffered longer and stronger than I ever did with anxiety. I refer back to #2 on this though....when you're ready to admit there's something going on, get help. Those that love you are still going to be there when you're done getting help and, frankly, it will change your life. If you are the friend or relative of someone that needs that help, be there. Just be there and know that it's very real even if you don't understand it.
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